|
|
|
her__*
.|izA` .2nd Febuary .nineteen .temasek design school .aquarius |
|
adores__*
.diamonds .music .diy .learning new stuffs .hairstyles .flea markets .exhibitions |
|
irks__*
.migraines .liars .cheaters .backstabbers .crowds .cramps |
|
wants__*
.more sneakers .mp3 .digicam .flipphone .travel .graduate |
|
|
Jewels...
Some things are better said many times. Some people come, and some leave for good. Before they leave, do treasure them and the moments you have with them. I'm good with my dearest cuz he's very good to me.
I heart you many many...
she writes at 02:55 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Season of Food
The rainy season has definitely made me crave undesirably for all sorts of food. A sumptuous feast is what I crave for. My pocket's been burnt so is my brain.
All I want for christmas is a sumptuous never-ending feast. Thai green curry, pumpkin soup, japanese food... the list goes on...
she writes at 01:02 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Champagne Glasses and Balloons
Set aside raya cuz it's almost over thank god. It's like a contradiction of what goes through the mind and what's noted. It's hard to concentrate if everything we've dreamt of keeps turning us down.
The RYC competition me and dear joined turned out to be fruitful. We're are the top 9 finalist, separately that is. We're hoping to win this and it'll be beneficial to me mentally. Keeping my fingers crossed to achieve something for once and something I might have a drive for. FYP on the other hand seems weak theoretically due to lack of concentration again and passion.
On the brighter side, it's almost the end of year and birthdays are so inviting in the earlier part of the year.
she writes at 01:19 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
I Love Green But Not A Festive of Greens
I don't like celebrating raya. It's sickening, tiring, awful. Plastic season. We face plastic people voicing out forgiveness but swearing and cursing inside. Let's just continue with life... And yea, no more fasting. God Bless!
she writes at 02:53 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
We're Aiming High...
My dear's birthday was 2 days ago and he's one lucky dude. He won first prize for the nike competition and me, him or rather us, got him, himself (it's confusing) a fisheye lomo cam. He keeps winning in competitions and it's a good thing. What else can I say? He's the best in everything... Other than him winning, we've been busy with competitions and late nights on the comp striving for perfection.
Fasting month has been pretty lazy with me slacking on the bed all day. But it's for a very good cause as the next 4-5 months, I'd be slogging my way through my final year project soon! Wish me LOADS of luck cuz I need that. I'm not that lucky...
Opposites attracts!
she writes at 12:47 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Land Of A Thousand Smiles
It's seriously great to be back home in the clean fine city. Bangkok trip was fun, shopping was great but we ran out of money fast. Wished we had more money! Glad to be back with Danish and the dude nearby. Plane ride was super cool. The takeoff especially.
I didn't know that Thais love pork so much that even their MacDonald's have Pork Burger~! Finding food was damn hard and I went to relieve myself 6 times within 3 days. Hurhurhur...lousy tummy. Breakfast at the hotel was nice if we had more time to eat. There was miso soup and the butter that we ate with the croissiant was super nice. Finding food outside was damn difficult but the pad thai we had there was damn tasty and good. The trip was overall kind of tiring with so much walking and shopping was a madness as time given was short yet everything was good. The places we visited was also cool. Especially Siam Paragon, the architecture was magnificent.
Ask me if you want more story, kind of lazy to list everything down. I would go back there again someday...
-PiXx-
she writes at 11:36 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Leaving On A Jetplane
I'm leaving on a jetplane, don't know when I'll be back again.
I know when I'll be back but I don't wish to come back if I'm flying to Japan or Dubai. Feeling nervous flying off for the very first time. So damn nervous I keep having nightmares about airplanes. I hope they're not true or somewhat like Final Destination part 1! Like usual, before you leave, all sorts of trauma tears you apart. The kind of trauma you wished you had venoms to spit on the man (man, not dude. there's a difference). Utterly disgraceful.
Bye bye Singapore. I'll miss the CLEAN city...
she writes at 12:56 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Denied
When you're left in the dark, find a way out yourself.
she writes at 08:28 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Flew By
It's hard to get by these days and what more with some dickhead actually having to critise you and rub on it time and time again. They try every mean to bring you down with their words and power. It just sucks to be around people of authority or elders. I'm trying to put up with their nonsense and impetuous ways. They just aren't being reasonable. They are so fake I can see through them. They are just using us to get to a higher ground stepping on us. Karma will take them down for sure.
On a lighter note, Bangkok is in less than a month. Excited for my first plane ride! With a knowledgable guru coming along, it will be so great to learn something new other than just shopping. Of course shopping is a must but thanks to ?me? I won't have much to shop. The fun part is, I'd be away from everyone here without having to put up with them. No complaining, no scoldings, no tolerating, just peace. I will only miss the dude.
she writes at 09:57 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
We're Second
Working sucks. Period. Just like period.
Glad to be back schooling, I think. It's true when adults say schooling is better than working. If you want to work, you better find a job that you love and enjoy. Otherwise, we'd be better off dead.
A glimpse on what happened during the Singapore Street Festival 2006. Dearest got 2nd place with his awesome work. That's super great as the winning piece with much respect, was a strong and tough competitor. Here it is...
she writes at 10:57 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Accomplishment
The clock strike midnight and it's time not for Cinderella to return home, but to wish my dearest Norazima aka Zimmy Neutron a Happy 19th Birthday!! You evil monster, you better unevil yourself. Okay no such word, just wishing her that's all.
I've waited for this day for sooO damn long and finally, I did it. The satisfaction of having to donate blood to someone who needs it more than me gave me so much experience that I want to go back in another 2 months time. Hell yeah have I been wanting to donate but too lazy to go over to Outram to do it. A past entry on donating in school didn't happen as they had an overwhelming response. So I did it today anyway. A good experience and a start to do something different for the day.
And then there were actually behind-the-scene experience. I was terrified like hell I either kept quite or I talked too much. I did the latter more as it helped me relieve my 'retardedness'. I kept saying I'm going to die after this as the time showed 4.44pm. I whined about being so scared and poor Neutron had to listen. Procedures here and there and then everything happened so fast. Not painful. Okay a little but only for a second or two. Got a free mini soccer ball as they wanted us to squeeze that thing. Sounds wrong but it helps blood to flow. Refreshments were provided after the blood transfusion. It's so fun to donate blood. One good deed done, yessar... What's next?
she writes at 12:01 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Passion or Passé?
When we have a passion, we go for it. We do something about it. I tried, I failed. I just move on cuz tomorrow will always be a better day. There will always be other alternatives. Sometimes, I just don't get it why passion can't move us. If we don't move mountains, who will? I need another vacation.
she writes at 11:38 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Believing Is A Fact
We live each tomorrow to the fullest
to do something which we didn't the day before.
We fear tomorrow
for something that doesn't exist today.
We are just that paranoid
being overwhelmed by emotions that transcend understanding.
We use more of our brain than our heart
seeking answers for assurance.
We waste our time worrying, fearing
and not enjoying each moment as it passes by.
We live each day in fear, doubt, paranoia
for something that doesn't exist but we believe it does.
If we believe in something it is then a fact
no one can change that fact unless you believe you can.
she writes at 01:13 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Happy 19th Birthday Ira
There's so much information in my mind that some had dispersed into my stomach. I’ve been learning lots of stuffs that are interrelated. It’s like killing 10 birds with one stone. Okay kidding. School term is coming to an end for me. It’s good news cuz the preaching and bragging will be put to a stop for the next 9 weeks or so. I just love block-teaching.
Oh yea, Happy 19th Birthday to LiL`cHiKa aka Nazirah Binte Zainuddin. I still remember all those things. Amazing eh grl. Okay that’s all folks.
I’m suddenly into reading.
she writes at 12:46 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Poof~!
Argh pissed~! I can't get any idea out of my head. So I do have a problem with myself. 1st comes school then comes stress, pressure whatever it's called. I don't have a distraction, I just can't work my brain, right side specifically. I don't think I want to continue studying after getting my diploma which I hope I get. Perhaps I just need a looooooong break before I decide again.
she writes at 02:47 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Dead End to Weekend
I had enough of Mr-Know-It-All. It's becoming a drag to go to class. Most things are repeated, and you brag alot. Ouh please, spare me some freedom to sleep in your class. Some things that are given excessively may cause drowsiness, and it's happening to me. Go away I don't ever want to see you again. But wait, Project 3 with you?!?! How can!!
Anticipating the weekend. A long 3 day break with plans in between. Hope that everything planned will go smoothly. Okay I'm excited that's all.
she writes at 12:08 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Since 5th May 2001
A change for today. Plans made were cancel. Kind of disturbed by it, but all's fine. We compromised.
A quick trip was made today with me and dad to Garden of Rememberance. It's been 4 years since I last visited my Granpa. He's no longer with us, but he'll forever live within me. He's the one that made me stop my habit of biting my nails, somehow. I got to owe that to him. I still remember the day he left us like it was yesterday. The deepest regret in my life was not attending that ceremony which I don't know what it's called. Somehow, I know he was giving me his blessings for my examination that I had on his departure. God bless his kind soul. I miss you so much Granpa.
On a lighter note, my eyes feasted on alot of unusual structures on the west side of Singapore I've never seen before. I want to get my license quick and travel on my own. Tomorrow's another school day. Music class! Yay~!
she writes at 12:40 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
A Month Later
The dude's a vector king. I love it! Thanks dude!
Hmm... I'm suppose to recap what happened since I last updated but I can't seem to remember anything. The only haunting I have is the project brief given by my lecturer. He's a cool guy. His stories are damn interesting and his classes are never draggy.
Today's a cool date. The timing is nice too. So yea, I've updated. Yay~~~
she writes at 02:02 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Runaway to Neverland
Weekend Leadearship Seminar(WLS) at KL was exciting. It's the 1st time that I've been to a seminar overseas and I was totally wrong to misjudge the event. But somehow, I kinda knew it was going to be wayy too exciting thanks to the video shown at the Business Preview(BP). Not much happened, just the fact that I can clearly remember missing the bus for the 2nd seminar thanks to the badbadbad service at the hotel. Hence, the solemness in the hotel room alone, though it rocks?!! But all's well cuz I soaked myself in the bathtub earlier on. Kinda cool pampering yourself in the bathtub with a good book and music. It feels like heaven. Wished I had one at home. All I can say is, I've made the right choice and totally looking forward to the next event. Who wouldn't? This is like the most punkrock quick getaway ever. A last minute decision to have a 'holiday' before the school starts thanks to SIP. But it's hard since I'm away for 3 days from the lovely ones.
School has started and the 1st ever music class rocks. It left me wanting more when it ended. With my ex-french language lecturer teaching me, what more could I ask for. He rocks! Timetable's fine cuz they changed the system and I love it. Don't understand why studious students complain. They can't adapt that's why!
I have yet to get my internship logbook back plus my paycheck! This sucks cuz I'm running as dry as Sahara. I miss the people at work already, except bossy-auntie and hungry-uncle.
Have yet to sleep well since the past week. I'm missing the 10 hours of sleep everyday. Okay, I'm just that sleepy, that I don't get what I'm putting across and moreover, I'm talking in bad sentence cum paragraph construction. Okay I suck. See you~
she writes at 12:10 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
The Chemical Brothers
It's a chemical day today, kinda. First, I was sniffing glue in the office. Hahahaa. Hold your horses, just some minor work done to the shelving unit in the office which requires contact glue. It smelt like heaven at first, but too much makes you sick. What more with an empty stomach, the system inside whirls like a washing machine. Felt queasy alright. The second one was the bus. Literally pissing green fluid. Smoke was coming out. Wonder if it indicates hot or cold fluid. Okay, the point was, it was green! I coughed all the way back from the bus stop. I think it's toxic! Hahahaa... One thing in common the glue and that green fluid have in common was that it almost killed me. It's like The Chemical Brothers. Hahaa... I'm just that sleepy. Btw, 2 more days y'all! I shall savour every last moment there. Sure am gonna miss my colleagues, except for you know who. The auntie and uncle. He's a new addition. Welcome to the hate club bozoos. Haven't you heard? We're gonna get paid soon. Til then avid readers.
she writes at 11:21 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Soon
5 working more days!! Would be delighted to say sayonara to auntie soon. Oh man, when's pay day?
Oh yea taking the opportunity to wish the twins Farn & Fye Dharma, Happy 19th Birthday! 10 more months to my birthday. Hahaha..
Haven't you all heard of Google Earth? Fun la. Go try it. Feels like travelling...NOT.
she writes at 04:49 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Where'd You Go?
Recap on past week.
1: The auntie at work has always been a fucked up bitch. I freaking hate being around her. Other than that, I love working there. Oh and there's this new part-time hot chick that just joined. She's hot in a way... Hahaha...
2: I cut my hair. Yea, like finally... Loving it!
3: The dude's been nice. I'm hooked onto him. And of course, I'm hooked onto Fort Minor - Where'd You Go.
4: Been down with the flu and pills aren't working. Worst flu hit in my entire life.
Actually, I can't remember anything else that had happened. I still have this short term memory going on so pardon my brain.
A day without you is like a day without me.
she writes at 11:21 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Love Danish
Happy 4th Birthday Kenit aka Danish! Love you banyak-banyak! Fish & co. yesterday was nice except for the waiting time.
Oh yes, 2 more mondays then it'll be the opening of school. I kinda hate going to work but working there is sort of fun. The projects they do are super cool and the people are nice too. I just wished that the draggy mornings would end soon.
she writes at 11:52 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
8 Days
The bank's decreasing in size. There's many more pairs of shoes on the list. How to get them all? I must learn how to save.
3 more weeks or 15 more days til the end of my attachment. Yay! Work's better now but the only thing I hate is that auntie sitting behind me as she makes so much noise, and of coz the morning madness. I hate waking up early. Not a morning person definitely.
The trip to TP Design Grad Show was fine. Nothing interesting. Next semester will be my turn. I hope to get through it fast and good. Can't wait for school to start... but I still need a holiday.
she writes at 12:50 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Shoe Comforts
Got myself a new pair of converse shoe, like at last. Still pending on a few more pairs. I just can't stop. One of a kind addiction.
Sometimes, ignorance is bliss to avoid a mindbattle. Like a minefield that's ever so sensitive, a wrong step could be deadly. I'm the mine and you're stepping on it.
she writes at 01:05 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Shoe Therapy
Tell me if you've seen this shoe somewhere in Singapore. I've got a sudden crave for blue shoes.
I was informed that starting tomorrow and lasting for two whole week, work's going to be hell. Well, not exactly hell. Just the fact that I won't be able to go home early. They're soO going to compensate me. Wonder what's the compensation amount. Everything else now gives me a brain massage. If only I could bring myself to leave my mobile at home, but I cant! I need a shoe retail therapy badly.
I feel like a zombie as people watch me from a distance thinking what's so wrong with me. With loud music plugged into my deafening ears, I stare into space without having to blink for quite some time and I've got no form of response to what's happening around me. I'm not quite my usual self knowing that I've come a long way to still not know what I want. If only now is a proper vacation, I'd probably pay my debts to my king koil which had been neglected last semester. All I need to find out now, is that I'm not being misled into a situation totally uncalled for.
she writes at 10:30 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Cursed
Here's a recap of what happened. Alot of bad luck fuck. Once is bad enough and I had to get my lucky number of two, but in an ironic way if you get what I mean.
The week started seriously fine with a meeting session after work with the dude and his friends. The same old stuffs of cad editing done at work. A new project midweek was a guidebook for DBS and I had to do the layout. Well, my initial thought 2 years back was that I could pursue visual communications as my diploma but hell right my last minute decision to pull out was greatest stunt ever. Being ever so rash and indecisive, I switched course to what I'm currently pursuing in case you're unaware. I do admit I hate and struggle like hell doing interior architecture, but it's nice, fun and exciting. It's somewhat of a challenge and drama being in ID. Ouh well, the point is, I suck at visual communications. Layouts are not my cup of tea. Ironically, the layout done for Mr.Zuck was the best. I'm weird enough to be unsure of what's nice and what's not. Let's just put it as I'm super duper flexible.
The bad luck part which I have to tell the whole world. On Wednesday, I spilt my associate's tea on the carpet. Such bad impression I give to the person who's going to grade my overall performance for my attachment. The following day was hell. It spoilt my mood for the whole day. I got fined for jaywalking. Oh I didn't jaywalk okay. I just didn't set foot in between the parallel lined 7-foot pathway to cross. The young malay ass traffic police guy who fined me was reluctant to do so seeing a fine young lady like me breaking the rules. Hahaha. Ouh well, 20bucks flushed down the water closet for misinterpretation of where my feet should be. Dammit, I'm fined~!
On a lighter note, I got to step foot yet another first time at Mod Living, Odeon Towers located as North Bridge Road in case you're wondering where it's at. It's a furniture showroom. Funky furniture arts they sell there. Didn't I said before I love exhibitions? It's the same genre.
A week long of updates, I'll end off with an image of my next hairdo once my pay gets through! Since I cant make up my mind whether to keep my long hair or cut have it short, I'll have them both to satisfy my desires. Ouh, I've got another desire elsewhere but he's feeling frustrated and I'm scared. Okay enough talk, just admire the gorgeousness of the hairdo.
she writes at 11:52 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Shoe Fetish
Oh the date's cool. Reminds me of the band March12. Okay whatever.
I just need to countdown. 6 more weeks or 30 more days to the end of my attachment. Suddenly, I love autocad. I hate filing papers. On friday, the noisy auntie didn't come so no filing for me, and peace was welcoming.
Can't wait for payday. There's many things I want to get and the first thing on my list is that knee-hi converse shoe I've been eyeing. I've got a loooong list of shoes to get, I never get sick of them. If you don't know what to get for me as presents, just think of shoes. Okay, I shall just shuddup. Til next week then.
she writes at 12:47 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Work That Ass
I've been so tired to even update. Work for the 1st three days was boring like hell. All I did was to file for them their past projects and to print some stuffs. I felt like a slave okaaay.
Yesterday, I went for a site visit to Marriott Hotel. 1st time stepping foot there. Got to visit the different type of rooms. The suite at the highest floor was awesome man. The view - spectacular! Yet another first time looking at teeny weeny orchard road from above. The whole idea for the site visit was actually to take note of the condition of the room cuz we're going to renovate it or something. I'm still blur at work.
Oh, autocad is a bitch but I'm getting the hang of it. My colleagues are great. 3 ex-students from TP. My coordinator's unexpected. Let's just put it as she's a young and a successful interior designer. She could be my role model for now. Oh well, the other half of yesterday and the whole of today was spent infront of the computer doing up a plan and 2 elevations. I'm dumbass slow on autocad. I need tutorials badly. Whatever it is, 7 more weeks or just 35 more working days! Yay!!
My sentence construction is very bad. I've got no juice left to think. I'm drained, just like the sewage drain by your house. Til the next time...
she writes at 11:49 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Who Left Me Out?
I got bruised on my right elbow and shin. I clearly remember knocking the pole on my elbow but the other bruise was god sent I think. Oh well, swimming with the keciks was fun. Danish wasn't afraid at all, thanks to me. Work's gonna start and I won't have anymore swimming sessions. I'm just panicking... Hope I don't drown at work.
Yesterday, I had a weird weird dream. One thing for sure the dream was telling me, is to pick up something useful soon or be left out. More like a hobby. I need to learn something new, fresh and fun right away. If you're feeling generous to teach, call me. I want to learn something new. Of coz I'll give my all if I'm interested.
Another thing, I was kinda shocked when Mr. Eyeliner said something I wasn't even aware of. Whether you're lying, playing a prank, or even telling the truth, I don't know for sure. I just have to say that I prefer initiators. I like if people asked me rather than I ask them. I got sick of asking people stuffs already. That's why I lay low now and avoid where I used to go. Don't say I never gave them the chance cuz I don't even know they knew I existed in their group. Being guys, I just hope you all have more guts than just saying you're shy cuz that's a whole load of crap, cuz I know you all ain't. Just be nice to me alright and perhaps say hi. Thanks for telling me Mr. Eyeliner.
she writes at 03:56 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Is Death After You?
Argh! I changed the layout again. I just think that the layout needs some kick, but I don't know what's missing. Any help anyone? damnnnnn.
Final Destination 3 with the dude was power to the max. Gorey like fuck. The ending has a cool ass twist to it. Somehow I kind of expected everything already. Nonetheless, I wished there's part 4 to it! Go watch it. It's a must!
she writes at 02:25 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Roots
Okay, it's time I stick to my old school colour. I don't know if it's kinda painful for the eye, but I love the linear elements.
4 more days to attachment. I'll make the most of my time sleeping I guess. No wayy cuz I feel like goin swimming. So yea, I'll be keeping fit to relax the mind. Well, I ran with my lil bro earlier on and my stamina is like zilch. I better start keeping fit like I did in secondary school. Team sports are so much fun but gathering a team is hard. I hate 2.4km!
she writes at 02:40 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Everything's Gonna Be
All submissions are over finally, and I'm totally over school. Yea riiiight. There's still my attachment which starts on monday. Hell right I'm going to freak out on my first day there. Oh yea and friday there's some stupid talk which is compulsory cuz it concerns my future. What future is there when I'll most probably join the Police Force cuz i doubt I'll make it as an Interior Designer. I just need some sort of motivation, but there's none so heck it.
Everything seems so vague. No matter how time and connection meet, everything has always been bleak and difficult. I realise that sometimes I should just watch the world go by than join in the rat race. I just want to please myself and others, but right now I'm rather displeased. The world has stopped and nothing progresses, except the bad guys. How I wish that all men are gay. Then there wouldn't be thing called 'war'.
she writes at 04:16 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
3D Viz
I've not been eating and sleeping well since Sunday but I got my 15 hours of sleep yesterday. Felt like 4 hours actually. 2 more submissions left and that rocks. At last I finished my 3D Viz project. There's an animation to it too. It was kinda last minute, really small and took only 40 minutes to render. My other coursemates took like 30 hours plus. I guess size does matter. Mine's wayyyy too simple, but I love it. The coolest shit I've done in my entire life. Catch the link at the end of the entry alright. Tom, Dick and Harry, Mary, Jane and Sally, do comment on my coolest shit! Critisms welcomed too. Much appreaciated.
I just realised that the only song which is always in my playlist all these years be it from the old MD player or discman whatsoever was none other than old time favourite Save Ferris - Let Me In. The song rocks although it's slow. I'll never get sick of it. From the lyrics, vocals to the violins! Everything's perfect. If only I know how to play the violin. The lyrics somehow relate alot to me. Hear the song, read the lyrics and you'll find out why. Ask me if you don't have the song cuz I'd gladly share. There are always other alternatives on the net.
3D Viz Animation. Enjoy!
she writes at 10:36 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Starting Point
Ate at our oldtime favourite place Istanbul near our old house for mom's birthday. Food was great, especially Nestum Chicken but I had an attitude problem so I didn't talk much. It sucks to be told what not to wear when I've been wearing like that ever since. It's like everytime~
I can't get to sleep as I've got a self-submission tomorrow. As much as I love sleeping, I'll sacrifice it one way or another. Brightening up someone else's day is what I love doing even if I get nothing in return. Don't say I've got nothing better to do cuz it's the satisfaction I get when they're happy and smiling. Well, sometimes I don't care about myself as much as I care for others and sometimes I'm obsessed with myself but I still do care for others. I'm just that complicated. I'm hoping that nothing will ruin my plan tomorrow like it did four years ago and that's when I stopped believing. So tomorrow, I'm starting over alright...
Oh fuck I'm hallucinating again. I better sleep before something scary appears.....
she writes at 07:23 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Sending Signals
There's always a time when you want something but you can't have it, and there's always a time when you don't want or need something but it's there, irritating you like a bee, buzzing away though it may not seem obvious but it actually is. What I need is him, what I don't need is you. Oh well, bees do sting and it's so damn painful but they'll die after that. So that's what you get for stinging me, you bloody bee.
Sometimes I just wish he cares more than just saying and of course meaning whatever he said. Somehow I feel just like another girl of his. I don't know what it's like to be moved anymore, I'm just numb. Whatever special thing between us feels there, but isn't showed nor expressed. Perhaps time is the factor. I've got time to spare, but I don't have a lifetime. If only there's a way to reach to your heart, and let you open up maybe you wouldn't be so scared coz you're not alone in this.
I wish to be a part of you, and you a part of me. I'll still wait for you. If only you hear this...
she writes at 04:00 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Artsy Fartsy
Friday surprise, surprise abes. Thanks arh Zak! I've got STM, so sorry and I kinda lazy to type what happen and sleepy too. So yea, it was great.
Saturday was Yatee's fleamart again. She didn't earn that much but it was cool alright. Like usual I would always find some treasures among people's junks. I love to improvise that's all. Hey, I'm not that weird.
Today, was the coolest. I love the new skin I'm in. Thanks to dearest Eman for the 'Art', you know what I mean. I'm loving it! Loving you too. Hahahaha!
PS: Do you know that I will be paid $500 for my Internship? Yea coolness, but it wouldn't be enough as there are many things I have to get.
she writes at 12:41 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
19 Years Later
Thanks to everyone who gave me gifts. I'm contented. Yatee got me a really cool royal-like green and gold bag from ebase. I love it man! Thanks alot!! Mom gave money and of coz Dad treated to Sakura. Full til my stomach looks like a balloon. Hahahaha. It's been great. The day's been great. It's ever so memorable.
Tomorrow is another day out. Wonder what's in store there lil pal? Oh yea, I'm signing my internship contract tomorrow too. Wonder how much I'll be getting. Oh well, just happy to secure a placement after much laggyness from me.
Happy 19th Birthday to ME! :)
she writes at 11:46 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Eve Of My Special Day
It's been good. Got 2 early gifts. A Guess wallet from my cousin, whereby the design is so me with green leafy patterns, yea. Also, a lil portrait by Eman which is so damn cool I was lost for words when I opened it. My jaw was so painful from all the grinning. I will post pictures of them tomorrow or something.
Oh yea bought a lil gift for my twin pal, Sherlyn, who has the same birthday as me. It's a lil gold blingbling lizard pin. I wish they had another one for me. Oh well, instead I saw this cute lil handphone keychain of a four leaf clover with a fairy. It's so damn cheap and lovely. Of coz I bought them for myself as a gift. Hahahaha. So yea, I'm happy, I'm delighted, I'm all smiles, I'm blessed and of coz I'm still grinning excessively! :) :) I just love 2nd February!
she writes at 09:50 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Fast Forward
Fast forward the date for me but don't let my excitement turn into disappointment. Thanks yo!
she writes at 04:33 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Dreaming A Surprise
Long weekends ahead will be spoilt by lotsa project submissions. Nonetheless, nothing's going to spoil my mood to have fun or no fun and just daydreaming, which I excel in. I'm getting all excited for next week but I don't wish to be disappointed from all the excitement, if you get what I mean. I hope that this year's special day would be something unique, unusual, unplanned, uncalled for. I love and hate surprises. So just surprise me okay? Cuz I'm getting all excited.
she writes at 02:47 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Everyday's A New Day
Yesterday was Dad's birthday. Ate at Han River. Not nice at all. Home bbq is still the best. And perhaps we'll be eating at Sakura again on my birthday this time. Yay! Time to indulge in Japanese food.
I didn't sleep at all yesterday, thanks to Retail Studies submission. And this was the first ever time I stayed awake for so long. I actually puked before going to school, which has never happened before. After a tiring day of lessons, I actually have the energy to play Captain's Ball with my friends. It's good exercise actually and helps me to relieve stress. I didn't have anything except for 2 pathetic curry puffs the whole day. Ouh, I was the also the only pathetic one barefooted as I wore slippers to school. Now both my soles has blisters. Ouch alright! Yea it's time the eyes shutdown before my system overloads.
she writes at 10:40 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
White Flag
One thing for sure... I'm going nuts. There's too many submissions at a go, internship confusions and internal disputes with myself. I think I'm having the old sickness again. Eating without knowing what goes in and feel like puking there after. Stress is getting to me though I may not show it. I think I'm raising the white flag soon. I feel like pulling out my hair. Arghhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
Oh yea, I might be donating blood tomorrow at some blood donation drive in school, just to relieve stress. Sounds totally uninsane!
she writes at 11:36 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Revamped TDS
Yesterday was a body tiring day. Open House at my IAD booth sucked. Hell yea it does. After my shift duty was done, thankfully, I initially headed to the stage area to catch a glimpse of Sly and Olinda, not that I love them, just that they came to TP so no harm catching a glimpse as I was in the vicinity. Superstars are always late, never punctual, get it? So the plan changed and I headed for the mini floorball area to try it out. It was freaking fun. I was the only girl left on the team in the 3 on 3 match as they keep on changing players. 40 minutes of non-stop fun sucked the life outta me. I was totally drained. Thankfully I didn't faint nor get heatstroke.
Later on, I stayed on in school til nearly 10pm! Was watching 3 kickass dudes beautify design school with graffiti. Eman's good (Yea, don't smile too wide if you read this). Jam & Hop was happening around that time but I couldn't careless about it. Oh yea, I got a chance for the very first time to spray a part of a character thanks to Eman. I've never sprayed anything before. It wasn't easy! I was glad I got the chance. Wish I could do somemore :)
Yesterday left me with a 'paralysed' back. It's aching like hell. But I had so much fun, it couldn't have been better. Especially how it ended...
she writes at 09:52 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Posterised
On monday there will be another interview. At Capitaland this time. I hope to get through this interview and secure a placing, fast. I don't have much time to spare anymore as other submissions are killing me. I just wish there isn't such a thing called time.
Do I really have a poster face? Do I look different all the time? I must say that I don't have a fixed personality or style, and I love it! Got a problem with that? Just go away okay?
she writes at 10:54 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Mesmerised
Open House was tiring and shitty. I hate crowds, that's why. The only good thing was, I saw my primary school crush. Still as good looking as ever. He's a chinese btw. Commented on his good looking genes and he grinned from ear to ear. How cute. Other than that, I was mesmerised by a special someone who was spraying. He's good and he rocks.
Tomorrow's another Open House ass day. Argh~!
she writes at 11:05 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Pissed
I hate Digital Essentials because I hate the lecturer. Pissed~! Okay bye!
she writes at 02:43 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Watercolour At The Waterfront
Today's watercolour class at Studio Haroobee, Esplanade, with Zak, Zeed and Sha was good. Learnt something useful that could be applied to what I'm currently majoring in. Performance at the waterfront by a Thai band was great. The singer sang too well :) Hanging out with them was good.
PS: Zak, how's the progressive music? Hahahaha...
she writes at 12:20 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Traumatised
My 2nd bro fractured his left shoulder during hockey practice today. Ouch~ No hockey practice for a loooong time I suppose. Poor him. Hope he recovers soon.
Oh yea, Tuesday's my interview with DesignPhase. I'm as scared as fuck. Hope this is my one and only interview so I don't have to go through other company. I like this company anyways. Yea so, wish me lotsa lucks.
she writes at 02:11 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Model For A Day.
Yesterday's photoshoot by Parv, Nat & Nad was good. Weird but good. It was some project thing for Parv. I was the model. Yea so, I had fun. Won't go into details. Don't ask about it also. Hahahahaha.
I've send out my CV to the 4 companies I picked. Hope to get a reply from them asap. Really nervous having to go through the interview procedure which I hate so much. 11 more days to the deadline. How screwed can I get? I'm hoping for some miracle to happen though.
2006 has been fine so far. Hope it gets better.
she writes at 02:11 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Brand New Life
Countdown at Esplanade with Tasya, Nad, Parv, her couz and her couz's husband was superb! Fireworks never fail to amaze me. The spot we sat was so perfect that the firworks showered us with 'wahs' and I felt like a little kid looking up into the sky with my mouth wide open. I prefer this year's countdown to the previous. Totally kickass.
I got my haircut today too. I love it so much as there's lotsa layers as always. And the best thing was, my hair length was maintained. Now I hope that my hair would grow faster so that it'll perhaps reach near my ass soon :)
I predict that this year is going to be a rocking good new year. Hope that my prediction is true.
Happy New Year to all!
she writes at 02:45 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Everything New
Going to get a haircut today. Can't wait. I still love lotsa layering on my head. Hope it turns out nice and different. I'm sick of the same hairdo all the time.
Later today will be meeting darling Tasya, but we still have yet to decide where to go. Time spent with her are always fulfilling and the best. Love you ya dol!
I hope every year will be better than the previous. That's all folks. Bye bye 2005! 2006 here I come!!
she writes at 02:03 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Buzzing New Year
Guilty conscious strikes me when I least expect it. I hate that. I hate it too when suddenly I feel that there's too many bees sucking on my honey, at the wrong time. Hahahaha! Whatever that means. I'm just a sucker for cute guys that's all :)
Have yet to come up with a resolution but I'm nearly completing my last year's. I hope that 2006, will be a merry one. And hopefully I can have my first ever plane ride somehow and also for a cooL birthday :)
she writes at 02:08 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Joy of Portfolio
I passed the portfolio procedure! My lecturer approved it today, on our 2nd meeting. The 1st meeting was a last minute anyhow work. The 2nd was done with lots of effort adding the heart and soul put into it. I'm just into the number 2! Hahahaha! Yay! So happy! Next will be the interviews...how scary :|
she writes at 12:43 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
3 Cheers For The Comp
Yay! So the comp's not a bitch anymore. Everything's back to normal. The internet connection took sometime cuz I didn't know how to reinstall it. But I did it anyways. Ya, I'll update another time when I'm done with the damn portfolio.
she writes at 07:42 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Closing Time
It's coming to the end of yet another year. This year wasn't as disastrous as the previous. Yet another resolution to be made.
School's coming to a halt in a fortnight. I can sense that during that week, it'll still be hectic with me rushing for all sorts of school stuffs. School's shit when you're aspiring to be a Designer. I still have a longing to join the Police Force but Interior Design will always have a heavier percentage. Why do I sometimes complain when I already know the obvious? Obviously, I need assurance!
Bro's going to get the computer fixed really soon I think. Comp's being a bitch since godknowswhen. I hope he fixes it really soon so I'll be able to finish my portfolio on time. I'm the only laggy bastard. The rest probably have 20 times more work already done than myself. No kidding I tell you. I'm slower than a tortoise, snail, ant. I'm just paralysed~
she writes at 02:23 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Baby Aceh
Yesterday was a happy, joyful occasion. My eldest cousin's wife just gave birth. Yay! So the baby boy is my 1st ever nephew. That makes me an auntie! Hahahahahaha! Happy Birthday Baby Aceh (baby's still nameless, so I name him after my cousin first). Welcome to planet earth~! And you're a Sagittarius!
Hmmm.... I've been feeling the weirdest lately. One minute I'm fine, happy and crazy, the next minute I'm plain crazy, in a negative way. I don't know what's wrong with me. I tend to get upset and furious over the lillest things. It has been a bad week I guess. But all's fine since late this evening. I owe it to them people. I guess I'll be back on track soon enough, unlike the past months where I've been practically dead, and stubborn about certain stuffs.
she writes at 11:44 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
People Always Leave
Life's full of surprises they say. That's why people always leave, when you least expect it.
I've got a problem with me. I'm starting to be forgetful again. There wasn't anything wrong with my memory til school resumed. I'm just school-scared, if there's such thing. And yes I'm the biggest procrastinator. I slack too much til I panic at the very last minute but still get nothing done. People always lie when they say they've done nothing at all. I always say what I mean and when I say I've done nothing means there's really nothing I've pondered about at all. Such liars~
I still don't like guys cuz I compare them with living examples around me and they totally freak me out. The two men that are closest to me, freak me out the most. From them both is the reason why I don't get involved with anyone. They're insignificant to me as of now.
Pictures from the exhibitions are up. Enjoy~! here...
she writes at 12:49 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Exhibition Junkie
Saturday's exhibition visit to Streettease at Bugis Street and Phunk Studio's Decade of Decadence at Singapore History Museum with the school boys Eman, Rahman & Alex were wicked. I totally adore exhibitions. Why with guys? Cuz they're a bunch of fun-and-hyperactive-crappy-endless-lame-joke species, nothing more than that.
Streettease was awesome cuz they handed us goodie bags worth quite abit. It contains a thick A5 size sketch pad, 2 design magazines, a fabric pen, a marker and 2 buttons. I adore buttons! That was it I think. The entrance was expensive, about 15bucks. And the best thing was, we got in for free cuz we're TP students. How cool is that huh.
As for Phunk Studio's Decade of Decadence, I was totally awed by the presentation and works of course. You just have to check it out for yourself. It was simply superb! An exhibition beyond description.
As for today, I went to The Gallery Hotel for the Creative Youth Exchange exhibition with Zim, Fion and Weiyi. We didn't get lost, just the stupid chikopek MRT man at Clarke Quay station was grining ear to ear when I asked him for direction. And bloody hell he gave us an anyhow direction. We still managed to get there with the help of a cab.
The exhibition was totally unexpected. Only 3 rooms caught our fancy. It's actually an exhibition of hotel decor. Somthing along that line. We joined the competition organised as part of our school project. But the thing was, the lecturers got us to do something that wasn't even close to what we saw at the exhibition. The exhibition was more like a decor kinda competition. Our lecturers got us to change the fluidity of the room blah-blah cuz we're future architects. Hahahaha. That sort of thing where it wasn't even close to what the judges were looking for. Fion, Zim and me (Weiyi's not in the same course) were like totally pissed cuz it's like we're kinda side-tracked and cheated. Hahahaha. Maybe they used the competition only as a boost to keep us motivated. Whatever it was, what we saw at the competition, we could have done better. That's why the 3 of us agreed that now we know why TP Design school is on TOP! Now that's a morale boost for me! I'll post the exhibition pics when I have the time.
I wish to visit more exhibitions! Ask me along.
she writes at 12:35 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Confessions Of Sleeping Beauty
Time amounts to pressure. Sleeping is heaven. Music heals the soul. The rich damns the poor. Heat causes hole in ozone layers aka ulcers. Moving on is a deceitful way to forget the past. Forgetfulness has its advantages. Confessions are wicked.
she writes at 02:15 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Sleeping Beauty
I'm still pretty dazed. My mind's still on holiday but my body has to go to school every single day. My timetable has shown that my Mondays are not free anymore cuz I've added another subject.
I'm like already having the chills and jitters from the pre-attachment talks. I hate going through interview. I've never fancied working life. I hope I pull through this semester and the SIP. I can't freaking wait for it to be over. I've done nothing for my portfolio. I'm always lagging cuz I've got no motivations or whatsoever. I wish to quit school and sleep for the rest of my life.
she writes at 12:16 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
School Fever
School has started! But I didn't go today as I've got no classes on Monday. I'm in need of another subject so maybe my mondays won't be free anymore. It all depends. I miss my friends only. There's nothing else about school that I miss. Not even the lecturers cuz they make our lives a living hell! It'll be another tough semester I guarantee.
All the cravings for food that I desire most have come piling up on me just because I've got cash now. But I need to save and exercise. It's all a matter of choice. And i'm bad at that.
she writes at 12:59 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Selamat Hari Raya
Today's the big day. Hari Raya that is. I'm not excited at all.
What do I think of Hari Raya? A period of shedding crocodile tears, asking for forgiveness and yet we'll still do it again anyway, exhaustion from pre-preparation and hunger, excessive intake of sugar, role plays of approving something which you don't normally agree, and of course fake smiles. All these just to get rich. I used to love Raya when I was still a kid. Not anymore. I can't stand having to put up with those bunch of people. The people who talk the talk but don't walk the walk. Please don't use us just cuz we're in the vicinity. I'll show you all the fakeness and sarcasm in me when I see your faces. Hate you all. Period.
Role play will be so fun if no one knows what you're up to. Let's just say I hate those bunch of people and the male species for now. Have a smacking good fake-smile-and-crocodile-tears Raya~!
PS: I'm still a freaking 50kg. I need to lose some fats. Fasting wasn't that all fulfilling. Screw HIM~
she writes at 03:43 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Narcissist?
Updates! Went to town with my cousins. Bought 2 bags. 1 Raya bag, another is some casual bag with chinese writings. Didn't plan to get Raya bag but I bought my last year's bag again cuz I love it. It's a long story la. I re-bought the bag, that's all. Got myself a navy blue belt with gold buckle again. 4 freaking bucks! It's similar to my green one if you know which one is it. That's practically what I got. Not much. Oh ya, and a hairclip. Haha...
After that, we went to Geylang. Dendeng again! But the dendeng I got today wasn't as tasty as the previous batch I bought last Saturday. Different place you see. Hrmpf~! But all's good. I still love dendeng! And Kahlen too if you haven't guess yet.
she writes at 02:57 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Wishful Thinking
A good chat with my past made me feel better. It's time I let go. It's not that hard right? Oh well, better friends than enemies.
I trimmed my hair last Saturday. I feel lighter now. Got my dendengs last Saturday too. Playing Uno in Geylang couldn't be much fun without the iad kids. And before that, I saw a bastard whom I thought was dead. But all's fine. I wouldn't let a bastard ruin my life. Neither would I hate. It'll only affect my health. Raya's in a week or so and school's reopening in two weeks. My portfolio, I've yet to touch. I'm soOooO dead.
Since I'm fine, I shall live my life freely from now on. I shall not be tied down with anything anymore. I wish to travel. If anyone of you saw the 'Emirates' advertisement, that's where I want to be. Anywhere near Burj Al-Arab. Do catch Amazing Race today cuz I wanna bungee jump too. Tuesdays, watch Extreme Japan. I want to live there. For OSIP I wish to go India, to visit Taj Mahal. Oh well, wishful thinking. I don't even qualify for OSIP. I'm just an average kid that's invisible. I love Kahlen!
she writes at 02:32 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Busy Bee
Been busy spring cleaning for Raya hence my disappearance. I'll update when I'm free. And one more thing, I didn't get my shoe!! ARghhhhhHHH!! K bye.
she writes at 03:36 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
That Little Lady
There's a man and a woman who tell lies. Well, who doesn't? But they did it to a little lady. They aren't caring enough to her. The woman screams while the man is a freak. The little lady feels that every step she made, silence overpowers her. There was no one she could turn to. There was no pride, no joy, no happiness in her. Everything she did, wasn't good enough. No one felt that she could make it. She didn't want to prove otherwise, as she loved making others happy. Her plan was to make others go, "See, I told you she couldn't do it." She basically did nothing, knowing she was already useless. She was just an average little lady. Pressure made her crawl back into her shell, while encouragement was all a well-rehearsed line behind a drama play. The little lady felt so pathetic. She hates that man and woman.
Everything felt so bloody dead and that one phone call which came in was all it took to take all the bloodiness away. Perhaps she didn't need that man and woman somehow. They're evil people anyway.
she writes at 12:36 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
TV Heals Wounds
Am I just lazy or plain cruel? An old friend have been wanting to meet up but I keep on giving lame excuses like, I'm busy. Well, I am. Or maybe I should say used to. The feeling is like, you want to meet up but you're too lazy to even get out of the house. I've just got something else in mind that's all. I can't decide. I'm just fickle-minded, fullstop.
Another week of One Tree Hill. Yay!
"The wounds of love can only be healed by the one who made them."
- Publilius Syrus
she writes at 03:06 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Leave A Trail
I can't get to sleep. Just some random thoughts.
far from sight
unspoken words
near seems far
i don't like now
sweet smile
happy memories
devastation sets in
comes a bitter ending
system malfunctioned
current breakdown
parts dismantled
unwanted and dumped
severe injuries
only casualty
just keep pushing
hoping, waiting
leave a trail
that's swept away
means and ways
to find and say,
"I Miss You"
she writes at 07:13 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
What's Your Request?
Happy 12th Birthday Danial! I'm 52 minutes late but at least I took note of it neways.
Later tonight will be the birthday dinner. Can't wait cuz I get to savour sushi and soba. Yummy. Oh and there's some thick chocolate brownie my bro bought too. Can't wait to see how freaking thick it is. I bought an Adidas water bottle for my bro. I like the design. I think he liked it.
1 more month til school reopens and I've got to finish up my portfolio! With Hari Raya coming up and having to do all preparations, I doubt I can finish. So much for a vacation. Hate school projects.
I feel like cutting my hair. Trim, I mean. I need a new hairstyle. I hate sticking to one for sooooo long. Shall browse through magazines or the internet before making a decision on what style I want to cut. Just some random thoughts, so don't mind me.
Oh yea, and I feel like getting a pair of green Duffs shoes over my ever favourite Vans of any design off vans.com . I can't decide. What do you think? Help?
she writes at 12:52 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Lords Of Dogtown
Lords Of Dogtown: Cool shit! Though the storyline could have been better, but it was cool shit la. Thanks for the invite Zuck!
Fasting month starting from today. Shall ask Daddy to bring me to Geylang to buy lotsa dendeng! Yummmy~ Can't wait for dendeng feast and Hari Raya. K bye!
she writes at 12:01 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Flea Market And Hot Hot Heat
Updates on yesterday's flea market. Oh it was freaking hot! Luckily there were Isetan paperbags to fan the hot hot heat. It was overall okay. Made 30bucks out of those unwanted clothes and bags and shoes of mine. 30bucks was fine cuz they were really really unwanted. Totally outdated. My 1st time riding on a trailer. It was awesome though bumpy. It's like riding in an army tank. Oh yea, I bought 2 bags and a top for 6bucks total. Don't you just love flea markets?
she writes at 02:19 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Morning Madness
Okay, so the fleamarket is today. I've got stupid stuffs to sell. Haha. Wth, I'm just going to make money here. Crap! Ouh, I'll be going to CCAB(Co-Curricular Activities Branch) at Evans Road to watch my bro, Danial, play hockey against some American school I think. It's at 8am and I slept for only 3 hours. This will be his last game before he sits for his PSLE. PSLE was like 6 years ago for me. Time flies really fast.
Hope I make lotsa cash today. But I haven't got much to sell. Wth. Hear from me again later.
she writes at 05:20 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Totally Jap Huh?
| You Should Learn Japanese |
 From Engrish to eating contests, you're born to be a crazy gaijin. Saiko! |
I've learnt Japanese but at a very basic level. I suck at French. Maybe I should pursue Japanese language at a higher level. Afterall, I'm all about Japan and their culture and food. Shall start saving and hit to Japan when I'm already 20!
she writes at 09:12 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
STOMP! On This
I wasn't satisfied with my previous layout as I did for Zuck his layout and it was nicer than my previous, so I had to come up with this. Now, I AM satisfied. There's mp3 too! I shall stick to this for a long time until I come up with another interesting layout to revamp. Tell me what you think of it. Negatives and positives welcomed!
2 days straight of Whose Line Is It Anyway still isn't enough for someone whose dosage of laughter extents to the sky. Never been this happy just watching a programme. I can't get enough of One Tree Hill either. The storyline is way better than The O.C. cuz it actually focuses on family and immediate problems in life. Whereas for The O.C. the storyline is too, urm, too rich for me. Haha! It focuses on rich people and problems they could have easily avoid. I don't know exactly how to explain but I love the casts though. Adam Brody~ Yummy TV just rocks okay.
STOMP! When am I going to catch it. Perhaps Friday. Shall ask Daddy to watch it with me or something. Anything for STOMP! Okay, I want to watch Liverpool vs Chelsea now. I supports Reds. Just like I did for yesterday's match.
she writes at 02:45 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Hello Future!
I hate to sleep when I'm not feeling really drained. Why? Cuz I think too much. I think of the worst things that had ever happened in my whole entire 18 years (not that I can remember my baby years). The thing with me is, I can't remember recent things but I can recall stuffs that are overdued. Maybe because it's too much to handle. I know that I'm human and I can't take pressures. All I can say is that I hate the year 2004. I love 2005! And hello 2006(soon ar)!
I'm drained now. Till then, another quote though you might have read this one.
Don't let today's disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow's dreams.
she writes at 05:15 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
What's Next?
Today's a fine day. The time works for me this time. 02.02 - my birthdate. I just love the number 2!
Results were released today. I was sleeping like a log when the message came through. The first thing I do when a message comes through is to look at the sender. The number was unfamiliar. I thought for one second that some idiot got my number from some friend. Well, it turned out to be my results. The system whereby we can choose to have our results send through text-message. Well, after all the hardwork I put into my IAD Project 2, I got a D grade! Yay! I passed. Thank god! Effort wasn't a waste at all! I passed everything but my grades sucked really bad. C,C+,D,D+ was all I got. No more A or B anymore. I totally lost it. This is the 3rd semester, going on 4th. And every semester, my grades are like landslides. I hate it. And it's totally my fault for making it turn out this way. No looking back anymore, just have to work harder. I've got no distractions at all. I'm just plain lazy.
After all that has happened, I'm thinking of options for the future. I'm thinking of joining the police force after I get my diploma hopefully, so my pay will be higher? Hahahaha! Another option is to work harder and perhaps pursue my degree under the same field. That is if I still have the passion and interest to continue. Other options like changing course is considered but I'm totally NOT going to make it happen. I really don't know what I want to do in life as my career. I still have yet to find a talent. I'm thinking that my talent, is to be talented. Hahahahaha! Maybe it works for me. What do you think? Oh well, all I know is that... I live a day for itself.
she writes at 02:02 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
No Regrets
Am I going to die? Cuz the time now is 4.44am. In chinese, the number four is pronounced as si and it means die which for them they believe it's bad luck. So does that mean that I should die die die now? Correct me if I'm wrong. I am chinese but I'm not superstitious.
Oh well, today I learnt that sometimes, some questions shouldn't be answered. Some things are better kept a mystery. I'm just curious okay. For me, what I learn in life so far is, i'd rather regret knowing than regret NOT knowing. So, the former overrules my learning in life and everything that I've said earlier. Afterall, I've got nothing to lose. Life's one big mystery, so why not discover it?
He who never made a mistake NEVER made a discovery.
she writes at 04:44 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
What IS Architecture?
Wednesdays are the worst day to be stuck home doing nothing. I don't even know what to do today. Surprisingly, I read something knowledgeable. Some thick-ass book entitled, The Book on Fascinating Facts I think. Interesting. Only to pass the time do I do something that's not me.
At night, Indecent Proposal was on. Great show to me I must say. The part on architecture really swept me off my feet. I somehow felt at that point, that what I'm studying in school now is really what I want to do in life. The lead actor mentioned about Louis I. Kahn, and the legendary architect said that even a brick wants to be something - a building; something that the world can feast its eyes on. It hit hard on me knowing that a non-living thing actually has a dream, or even someone dreamt for it. It really made me wonder.
For someone like me who knows myself too well, this pondering and hoping to change only last for the day. It takes a great amount of effort to change and I'm really not up for it. A leopard would never change its spot, neither will I. Guess I'm better off this way; clueless in life. Or maybe the existance of leopard should be erased so that that saying would not have existed and Man would have an easier time turning a new leaf? No! I'm totally wrong. It's time we or rather myself, change for fucksake.
Time to rethink fellow strangers!
she writes at 02:15 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
School's OUT!
Yea, school's finally out. The minute school was over, I went to Genting. I don't know why the location but it's such a bliss to be there. Away from the stressful life back here in Singapore. The rollercoaster rides and that almost-20-storeys-heartdrop ride was awesome. I guess my mind's fresh and awake since I've got school off my back now. I want more holiday getaways!!
Life's been calming. No one to disturb/irritate/pester/bother me, I feel good. Since it's the holidays and I've got about 2 months lazing around, I might be planning to pick up new stuffs and revamping my room. Well, it's easier said than done. So I'll just have to plan my days to make this work out for me, in order to start the new semester afresh!
I think I've got loads to write about, but somehow I seem to forget everything. My memory's still weak, so I shouldn't bother remembering. Till then, HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!
she writes at 12:57 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
It Ain't Over Yet
Last entry, I was practically struggling through my project. Last Thursday, my lecturer for once, liked my idea. I did everything required as always, except for my perspective drawings which practically sucked as I did it last minute. I was totally concentrating on my model. It turned out well, but I was too tired and my workmanship was poor. All I have to do now is to redo my model with good and quality workmanship, trace back all my plans, elevations and section drawings, as well as to draw 3 perspectives. For once, I think I can make it. I hope to pass this time. I don't hope for a high grade but just a pass for the project so I wouldn't have to retake it. How dumb can I get, only to realise the severity of passing the project last week. It's kinda late but it's not the end. Nothing is. I'll just have to work my butt off REAL hard for the next 2 weeks. Afterall, a big reward is waiting. And it's a trip to Genting. Credits to Dad. Can't wait!
she writes at 12:42 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Don't Be Shallow, Be Hollow
3 weeks left to wreck my brain, cut it open, squeeze it, whatever. I'm making a frantic last minute hunt for ideas, fresh new ones. However, nothing seems to be surfacing. My mind is totally hollow. I don't think there's a brain in it anymore. Somehow, I know I can do it, but there's always something stopping me. HELP?
she writes at 01:50 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Screw School
I didn't get to see the midnight fireworks display at Marina South yesterday. I'm hoping to see today's, but since morning, there's no plan whatsoever. I'm not surprised if I'm staying home just to watch the parade on TV.
Screw schoool! I'm beginning to hate school. Just the work part. Whatever I do, it'll be rejected. Yea, so fuck it man. Trying hard will only make me so fucking lethargic. Maybe I'm not meant to do Interior Architecture & Design. Maybe I'm just meant to do Interior Design. There's a fucking difference between it. I don't know about school anymore. Talking about it makes me sick. Feel like quitting.
she writes at 04:28 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Everything Sucks, So Do You
Friday's CCN day at school was fine. Nothing special. Wasn't looking forward to buying anything except to spend cash on food. Oh and I saw that same familiar face I saw last friday. Someone I've never seen before at school since I stepped here but keeps reappearing ever since last friday. He's cute alright. Bald and beautiful. Hahaha! Oh he smiled at me, so did I. Cheekyness~ At least he appreaciates my existence. Dating is boring. Flirting is much more fun? I like to be free from all these games...
I've not been going out on weekends since Baybeats, which isn't counted. I'm getting restless and feeling that everyone is triggering at me. Wanting to put me down for whatever reasons. I'm smarter than you think I am. I already have a plan to destroy you back. Oh what crap am I saying. I don't even have a plan to destroy the world, let alone anyone. I'm not evil.
she writes at 01:07 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
How Weird!
Weird things have been happening. My room door could suddenly be closed and locked. What I meant is, last time my room door couldn't be closed properly. When the wind blows, my door would open and it used to freak me out but I've gotten used to it. Now, my door could be closed tightly and properly, and it can be locked. No one fixed nor did anything to it and it suddenly works like normal. How weird!
The next weird thing is, I've not been lazing around that much though I'm frequently seen online on MSN. I've been busy doing my main project and other projects as well. Wonder if this hardworking person in me is just temporary. My perspective drawings have improved somehow, although I've not done any practice at all. How weird!
My memory is not functioning as well as it used to be. I keep misplacing things and losing them. I've yet to find my matric and proxy card but somehow I feel that I'll find it when I make a replacement. This always happen to me. Before I lose my mind, I better try to be more careful and start getting more organized or perhaps jot down every single details and movements I make. How absurd!
she writes at 01:56 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Sponsor Me
No plans for the weekend. I'm stuck at home with projects to do. The good news is, just 4 more weeks till the end of all project submissions. Yey!
My school is offering a trip to Jilin, China, during the month of October and it lasts for a month. It's a study trip and of coz we'll be learning there if we go. We'll be studying at some University there. Accomodations will be at the University's hostel. Price of trip, $1500! Where the hell am I gonna get that amount of cash within 2 months?! I really want to go but have yet to discuss it with my parents. Even if I do, the answer which I already know would be, is NO. Money isn't always on my side and I probably wouldn't get a chance to go. Perhaps I should start buying 4D or Toto to get that huge sum of money. Luck isn't always on my side either, so I guess it'll just be a waste of my money. Oh, I really want to go. Even if I work during the month of September where my vacation will start, it wouldn't be enough to save up for that trip. I wishing that some kind hearted soul would sponsor my trip, or perhaps lend me money for the trip and I'll pay them back when I start working after I graduate. It's wishful thinking on my part, as always... If I do go for the trip, it'll be a great opportunity for me to study there after I graduate and get my diploma here and persue my degree at Jilin, China, for only a year! How great will that be. If only my current situation allows me, my future wouldn't be so hazy as I've always seen it to be. Guess the haziness and fog just wouldn't go away. Little wonder I've got no aim in life.......
Still, I try to strive for the best even if I have to take the long route. I'm somehow going to prove that I'll drift away from all money issues.
she writes at 09:59 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
The New
Yesterday, I went to JB with my parents and youngest bro, Danish. Short trip to and fro but it was worth it. Cuz I bought a new hi-cut Vans shoe. Woohoo! It's white with black lining and it's leather, I think. Not real leather of coz. Loads of thanks to my parents. Ya, like my mama said, I've got too many shoes but adding one more to the collection wouldn't hurt right? Oh i'm not adding just one more. I want MORE! Got a shirt and skirt too. Both are black and white stripe. I love them! I love stripy stuffs!! So, I enjoyed the trip cuz I got new stuffs to wear. How selfish of me.
I'm beginning to be more hardworking thanks to An, my friend. He's very much of a slacker too but he urged and encouraged me to work hard and do my work. So i'm improving.
I'm happy. That's all.
she writes at 06:44 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Lazy Sotong
Oh suddenly i'm too lazy to update. Random thoughts, here we go~
I've dated and still dating. I'm boring and still boring. Feelings are like landslides. I want a new shoe. I'm broke. I must be hardworking and not slack to get better grades. Overall, my life's improving. Way better than last year. I realised that when you lose something valuable, you tend to get something much more valuable in return. Oh yes, I lost my matric and proxy card! I don't even know when I lost it until recently. I'm not sure if I misplaced it, or dropped it somewhere. I'm so careless and blur. When will the sotong in me leave. Heh~
i like my new catch...
she writes at 12:08 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Blissfulness
Monday, 11th July
Supposedly Zoo outing with Zim, Fion and her friend, Jasmine, to see the animals held captives. Errrr.... i know it's cruel. Whatever ya. The entrance fee was freaking 14 bucks instead of the 7 bucks i went in about 3 months back cuz i have my tertiary card. The fella said there's no more special offer, somthing like that. Moreover, it was raining cats and dogs, so we didn't even step inside. Except for the entrance where we took lotsa pictures for our project as well as alot of dumb ass pictures of ourselves. Had fun though.
We then left for Ang Mo Kio central to walk walk around and went shopping. Bought stuffs. 2 skirts and a top. Quite cheap though. Love them. Oh and more DIY stuffs.
Headed back to Tampines with Zim and we walked again. Didn't buy anything. Instead of heading home, i detoured to Bugis. Last minute thing. Meet up with An. Sat down and chill. Talk shit here and there. 3 hours flew by real fast. He's crappy. He's cute. He's got so much inside his mind. He's very theoretical and keeps saying, "You get what i mean?" Hahahaha... He's lovable to sum it up. Yea, so you know how i feel.......
Some pictures as promised.
Clockwise from top: Jas, Fion, Zim & Me
Fion, Jas & Me
God knows what we're doing. Spiderman or just simply Lizards.
Oh it's the Ben & Jerry's cow. Moo mooooo~~
Tuesday, 12th July
Slack day. Went to school library for awhile to do some research. Jannah dearest who got some serious punctuality problem was like 2 hours freaking slow and late. Oh but it's okay. Ya so, boring day. That's all. Hahaha...
Wednesday, 13th July
Outing with couz to Arab Street then to City Hall where we met up with our sis-in-law. Her sis-in-law is also mine right? Err ya, so my couz bought shoes for herself and her dad. Then another company came along. Yatee dearest. We sat down at Fountain of Wealth to have our Subway dinner. Then headed home.
Ya, what boring life i have. At least i've got a life.
she writes at 12:07 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Zoo Fever
Yay!! Zoo outing today! Pictures will be posted later i hope, courtesy of Fion's cam again.
Tell me if i did the right thing. I really want this to work out.
she writes at 01:05 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Virtual vs Reality
It's 5.32am and i'm still awake! I can't get to sleep cuz i'm too engrossed revamping this outdated layout site. Another reason, He called. Just to say he can't talk to me tonight. Sweetness. Putting too much hope can very much lead me down the drain eventually. So right now, i'm staying still, calm, whatever. Maybe it wouldn't be a drain this time. Maybe it's a pond? A rubbish bin? Maybe i'm just thinking too much. Let me have a little faith and i'll probably reach a pot of gold this time round. Only better.......
she writes at 05:32 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
*LoveLove*
Oh i'm happy. I got his number officially. With permission that is. I just feel so light and contented. I feel like twirling like a ballerina. *LoveLove*
she writes at 11:42 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Long Long Long Weekend
Friday, 1st July
Had my favourite class, multimedia fundamentals, with my wierdo inside, concerntrating can be difficult. Heh~ Met up with my couz after school and went to buy shoe. Damn the stupid salesgirl give me the wrong size. Partly my fault that i didn't check also, but what the hell, customers are always right~ ;P
Saturday, 2nd July
Went to exchange the shoe size and then met up with Yatee. Thrifting is good for the mind. Hahahaa~ Saw Hisham and his gang. Bought a bag, a cardigan, a skirt and a shirt. Thanks to Yatee for the skirt. I like, but i should try and shake some fats of me. Hahahahaa! Can't wait to go thrifting again.
Sunday, 3rd July
Argh~ 15 hours of hardwork just to meet the requirements of my Project 2A. NO SLEEP, red bull with 100plus, mommy helping me to anyhow trace and render cuz i've got no time, i really wonder why am i slacking? Is it me or the course. I'm losing interest by the day. How?
Monday, 4th July
Aka doomsday! It really is. Well, i failed. Half the class did. Oh well, just work harder next project then. Easier said than done right. Heck la. Gonna try my very very very best to catch up and prove everyone else wrong!
Zim, Fion and me treated ourselves to a scrumptious breakfast at the school cafe to mark the end of P2A. Ate a lil too much til i almost felt like puking! It was good though. Crazy pictures were taken. Really crazzzzzzzy i tell you. Credits to Fion's cam. Need to get one like real soon. But how? How again. I'm always asking how. Just throw me inside the dustbin please. Hahahahahahha!!
After school went to Tampines to hang out for awhile with Jannah aka Maria, Afia aka Mafia, Zim aka Mazima and myself, Maliza. The M gang. Hahahaha! Crap la. But they're fun people. Ouh ouh saw bro cuz he went to ntuc to buy food then went home together. Went home and still not sleepy yet so did some push up. Wonder why ah? Oh then sleepy so that's it. Sweet dreams Liza. And now i shall continue my sleep. So long and goodnight.
Don't let today's disappointments
cast a shadow on tomorrow's dreams. - Unknown -
she writes at 01:37 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
He's My Weirdo
I'm falling head over heels. He's such a charmer. Yes, once again i'm into someone. He's just a sweet guy. Though i may not know much about him and spoke only a few lines to him, he's great! I just hope that something real would work out. But then again, there's no such thing as a happy ending right? I just wanna be optimistic and fall for him, the dude in my life.......
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo. And he's mine.
she writes at 10:49 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Everything Will Be Alright
Ignore the previous entry.
Yes, ignore it. A moment of comparison led me to write stuffs which i really have left behind. I'm already learning how to do stuffs with rationals or i'll end up wrinting nonsensical, irrelevant, out-of-this-world stupidity entries.
Oh yeah, i made a deal with my couz. I'm helping her to shrink while me to get perhaps an 'A' grade for my project 2. *Keepings my fingers crossed* But i'll have to work extra hard. We'll see about it. Cuz the reward is totally awesome. Food Galore. I love!
Red Bull + 100 Plus keeps me awake. Yayness! Coffee doesn't work on me.
The past cannot be changed,
the future is still in your power. - Hugh White -
she writes at 01:35 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Something's Wrong With Me
"When I thought that it was over
I never would have thought that it would come back
I told everyone that the feeling is gone
Only to realise that I'm so wrong."
Please excuse me
While I make scarce
she writes at 02:21 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Yay?
Just two more weeks to my one week break. And during my break, it's Baybeats week. Yayness! Can't wait.
"The first sign of a nervous breakdown is when you start thinking your work is
terribly important." - Milo Bloom
she writes at 12:44 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
I'm Not Right. I'm Just Left.
Project 2 was nothing more than a waste of time. Ya, i wasted my time doing nothing. My brain works real slow, as always. I'm so distracted by the comp again, and i couldn't concentrate cuz all i was thinking about was sleeping alongside the dumb project. I just suck at this project stuffs. I feel so drained already. Wonder if i can survive till the end of this semester.......
Sleeping is the best thing in life.
Oh ya, did i mentioned that singlehood rocks? It really does.......unless i change my orientation. Hahahahahahaha!! Joking la peeps. You think i'd really do that?! Madness!! Till the next entry.
"Simplicity is the glory of expression." - Walt Whitman
she writes at 01:13 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Fun Wrapped Around Stress
This Thursday is my scheme review and i'm lazing around. I can't start on my work cuz the comp's distracting me. Yea, the comp. People get distracted by living things, but for me it's the comp. I need to get a million things done. Better start soon than grumble here.
Oh, this is getting weird. Weirder by the day. Yesterday, my friends and i played truth or dare. Okay, what the hell. As usual my dare was to ask some guy for his number. Someone my friend and i called, peanut face. Heee! I know we're mean but we couldn't help it. Cuz he really looked like one! Hahahahahahahahaha!! Okay, so the story goes like normal. Took his number and that's it. I don't bother messaging him. Don't ask me why. If i meet him somewhere in school again then i might consider.
As for today, i woke up with a greeting from some guy whom i don't even know. He's claiming that he got my number from a friend of his, who is my friend too, i think. And OUR friend name is like any typical Abu, Ali, Ahmad. How am i to know which Abu, Ali, Ahmad is that? Oh whatever, cuz i'll find out sooner or later. So the story will enfold soon enough i guess.
And later in school i was having lunch with my friends at Engineering school canteen. Wow, another welcoming gesture. Some
A lil hint or pointer. If you want something, go get it yourself. Or screw to hell with you~ I'm loving everybit of my life now. Cheers!!
she writes at 09:13 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Lethargic VS Pretense
Another it's-been-awhile-since-i-updated. Oh, i'm juz so busy with what else other than school. My 2nd major project is killing me!! Yes, literally wrecking my brain and manipulating my system. Somehow, all this make me drift away from all problems i have but still like i mentioned, is killing myself in return.
I have problem visualling and drawing perspective and that's keeping me from doing all assignments due for my major P2. Call me some future architect and interior designer, but i guess i'm not even close to that if i don't buck up. And yes, i wonder all the time if i'm doing what i like, love, whatever. I don't even know what's my interest. I don't even know what i wanna be when i grow up. I'm still a kid. I'll never grown up. I'm aware now that i'm not ready for anything, let alone a relationship. I should take things slow. Like really slow. Like a jet-lag or something. Like a tortoise. Like a snail. You get what i mean. Or you're no different from me.
I'm so tired to do anything. All those acquaintance and fake smiles and conversations i have to put up with, just to pass the scene, i'd rather be alone. I'm done with pretense.
she writes at 03:12 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Singlehood Rocks!
It's been a long week. So much has happened i tell you. At first there were none... but now.... like five competitors. You know what. I don't really give a damn cuz singlehood is feeling great. Super great!!
Today, i saw my ex's ex. Cool right? Lucky she doesn't know me or about my relationship... but... somehow, the look on her face tells me that she don't like me for some reason or the other. Though i know that she doesn't know me. Nevermind. I don't give a f*ck about what others think of me. Urm.... nothing more to say. Will update again.
To singlehood, I'm loving you!
she writes at 12:28 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Shooting Star *
My first ever sight of the shooting star. It was magnificent, awesome, marvellous, great, superb, whatever. It was an indescribable view. Way beyond the words used. Undoubtedly the best thing that i've seen in my life so far. The shooting star happened in a split second that i didn't have time to think of what i wanted to wish for. It's good enough that i've seen one. Guess i'm not so unlucky afterall. I'm happy. I'm blessed. I want more shooting stars. This is the best day of my life.......
she writes at 02:58 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Love Changes
Everyone around me, seems to be in love. Big deal. I'm not affected by the change. I'm so immuned already by all these minor things. I'm independent and shall always be. I don't need anyone to comfort me now. I just need my beloved pillow.
she writes at 12:58 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Scums Of Society
I thought that this problem we had was gone. But it all seems to come back in due time. Just hope that it'll be gone soon. And everytime the problem comes back, i fucking swear i feel like murdering those scums of society!!! That is why i've always had this thing for joining the police force, to make sure that all scums of society must pay a price for their wrong doings and be put behind bars to rot! FUCKING ROT i tell you!!!
Before i catch you, you better run. Don't ever let me catch you red-handed you ASSHOLE!!! Cause i fucking swear i'll call the police.
she writes at 12:26 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Totally Jap!!
Dinner earlier on was great!! Ate at Sakura, Safra with family and yatee. Oh yea, i tried fresh oyster! And it tasted.... quite okay. Only problem was that i didn't squeeze enough lemon on it. I was totally concentrating on the 'fishy' smell and that almost caused me to puke though my expressions didn't really show.
Cheesecakes, tempura prawns, breaded prawns, unagi or eel, sharkfin soup, ginseng soup, fruits, shitake mushrooms, hotdog, sashimi, sushi, fresh oyster, ice-cream, soba or aka japanese noodle, and wasabi!! All the food that went into me was worth it. I was totally aiming for the japanese section. I'm soO into japanese food and i still am. But too much raw food will make me sick. Not yet i suppose.
Just to wrap it up, it was worth the bucks and my tummy still feel full. Maybe bloated too. Hah! I just love trying new food. Any recommendations on where to eat next?
she writes at 12:19 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Randomness
1: I got the subject i appealed for, Multimedia Fundamentals. Yayness!! And the lecturer is pretty. From Lithuana.
2: Got a teeny-weeny crush on some newbie in school. But i'm not that bothered much by him. Just a passing thing.
3: Miss that cutie in school from last semester. That cute skater dude! He might have graduate. I don't know la.....
4: Everyone i know has a hidden agenda. I know... and not falling for their tricks.
5: Need a thumbdrive. Any recommendations?
6: Wants an mp3.
7: I'm still on holiday mode.
8: I need to start the semester by not being lazy like i did last semester.
9: I'm loving my life now.
10: I'm still obsessed with
"A warrior takes everything in life to be a challenge....... What matters most to a warrior is impeccability in one's own eyes." -Joseph Goldstein, The Experince of Insight
she writes at 03:04 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Appeals And Appealing
School's back to haunt me. Godammmit!! I didn't get the subjects i chose. Appealed 3 times so far and i still didn't get what i wanted. I'm still gonna try and try till i get the subjects that i want. Even if it takes me to send 100 copies of my appeal forms.
Other than subject selections which is making me cry for not getting what i want, design school is filled, flooded, ambushed with tons of babes, hot chicks, pretty girls, whatever you call them. As for the guys, hrm....... not much luck. There's not many guys and moreover they're not that appealing as the girls. Seriously talking man! You should just come down and check it out for yourself. Maybe it's too early to make an assumption bout the school not recruiting any hotties or cuties. Btw, it's only the 3rd day. So, as one would always say....... Patience is a virtue and i believe in that, it's just don't want to sometimes unless it happens to me.
Experience is always worth the ride though the result may be dissatisfactory.......
she writes at 12:34 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
School's Back In 2 Days
School's starting in just 2 days! My holidays are numbered~ Didn't go overseas. How boring is that?! Well, i'm glad school's starting so i won't have to take care of Danish again. Tired of having this babysitting responsibility. With new friends flooding the design school, gonna keep my eyes open on the lookout for cuties! Hahahahahahaha! Typical Liza~
Life's been fair. All's fair. I'm learning to get a grip of reality that bites and scarred me. I'm still strong as ever, only stronger now. Who cares what others think of me. At least i know, i know that i've learnt to accept hardship which hopefully and eventually will bloom into a smooth sailing future ahead of me.
Till then, i shall not worry over the silliest things and enjoy every bit of school.
she writes at 02:20 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Foul mouth With A Kind Hearted
Yesterday's outing to haji lane and arab street was fulfilling. Spent only 20bucks but got many stuffs. At last, i've got a pair of jeans that's close to white. I love them. Can't wait to wear them.
Although it was a great thrift-shopping day, it had to end like always, unpleasant. It's so my fault that i blurt out certain things to dear someone that only ended me up getting so-damn-fucking hurt~ and crying to sleep like an overgrown baby. For me, i don't regret whatever i've said or done to anyone. The biggest regret i'll have in life is to not do something or say something. So far, i've not really had any regrets cuz i always do whatever i feel is right for me, and say whatever i have to say regardless of what others may think of me rather than shut my mouth.
When i've moved on, the past will only be a chapter written in my head but unreleased. What the future holds, i shall not be afraid nor worry for it has yet to come. I'll just enjoy every moment of the present to make it worth remembering and later on continue my story that'll never ever be finish in my head.......
she writes at 12:46 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Got Guts?
Argh damn! Where have my guts gone to? I always had the 'go for what you want' attitude. This time around, i lost it. I rather sit back and wait. That's so unlike me. But i guess i won't be staying for long. Argh fuck! I won't sit here and blabber as well. Toodles~
she writes at 03:27 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Happy 20th Birthday Bro!!
The heading says it all. Happy Birthday again bro! No more a teenager and the near road to adulthood. Cheers!
If i had i choice, i'd rather stay a kid all my life. Though it's though being an adult, i'll have to go through it. And I will survive!!
I'm getting stronger by the day, so don't try to break the bond between me and wonderwoman. Hahahahaha!!
she writes at 12:36 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Don't Push Love Away
The Juliana Theory - Don't Push Love Away
Here's a thought, if you're willing to listen
I only tell the truth of the feelings I'm given
Can you hear me now?
Listen
Whispers in the rain
Listen
Don't push love away, you know you do
It's all we have
It's a chore holding onto a vision
Don't leave her high and dry
She's the one you'll be missing
Can you hear me now?
Listen
Whispers in the rain, while you're awake
Don't push love away, you know you do
It's all we have
I hate to think hesitation is a burden
A bittersweet design for a lesson you're learning
She's crying
Can you feel me now this time?
Whispers in the rain, lying awake
Don't push love away, you know you do
It's all we have
Here's a thought, if you're willing to listen.
I'm still singing this tune cuz i can never forget the past though i said i'll move on.
If u're willing to give me a second chance, i promise i'll change and make things better. Don't push love away, you know you do....... Stop running away and face the fact. You know i'm not over you.
she writes at 12:25 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Sport Mania
My cousin and i didn't head for the beach yest. We planned to go but changed of hearts. Took 31 from tampines interchange and suddenly my couz just had to mention the swimming complex when we're about to pass by it. She looked at me i looked at her. Then she told me to decide and i decided to go swimming in the clean and clear waters instead. Had fun swimming and crapping about in the water. My new found interest in sports revived once again. Hopefully, it doesn't fade off too soon. Our next sporting interest.......cycling. It's been awhile since i cycled. Yea, we're going to try and cycle to somewhere far. Trying to explore with our bikes.
Doing something fun and interesting takes your mind off troubles. And it did help me. So try it!
she writes at 02:38 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Make Me Glow
I'm off to East Coast to tan. Hopefully, i'll be glowing not burnt. If i get burnt, hope that my miserable past goes with it. Hahahahahahaha!! Madness~ The weather is scorching hot but i prefer this to cold weather. Brrrrr~ Maybe i'll have a picture or two posted up when i get back. Toodles~
she writes at 01:26 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
The Haunting
My past haunts my present. Some things i can never forget nor let go. It's best i try and move on. Although i might be doing so, my heart still stays and goes out to him. It's time i wake up from my dreaming mode and focus on the present so that i'll have a bright future. It's easier said than done as proven, but i'll try, for my own f*cking sake.
School will reopen in a month and i can't wait to be a junior. No more freshman or freshie~ Wonder if the new batch has a truck full of cute dudes. Can't wait to check them out. Heh! And hopefully i get to see that skater dude again~
Life's tragic so start cherishing everyone now.......
she writes at 02:12 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Drained~
Why drained you ask? Well i f*cking tell you why. I'm tried of being nice to you and all i get from you is "okay". What's that suppose to mean? If you want to end our friendship just say so. Don't beat around the bush cuz i'm tired of running around it dammit! I don't hate you at all but you're like practically shunning from me everyother time. So make up your mind what you feel before it's too late. No it'll never be too late cuz i don't mind waiting til i get an answer. And i'm not sick of waiting. I just want an honest reply. I hope this will get to you. I'm dying to get back with you.
she writes at 01:45 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Blissfulness
Finally, the big day is over and everything turned out perfect. The decor was in lilac and i love them. Everything was so freaking nice that i wished i was the one getting married. But to whom? Hahahaha!! I did help out giving out berkats and clearing after people... but soon enough, i got distracted. Hahahahaha!! The photographer, so cute and charming. Can't help stealing glances at him. Heh! Saw a familiar face. Dah tu jer. I'm just freaking exhausted although it's over. So here's one picture of the Love-Birds with me and my aunty. My couz's the guy. And his wife is soOOooOo damn gorgeous in her gown. Wish u all could have see her in person.
Left to Right : Me (Damn i look weird), Kak Ferdawati (Gorgeous Bride), Abg Shamsir (My couz) and Mak Lang (My aunty)
So that was my first ever official wedding which i experienced for my first time. Wonder who's next?
she writes at 12:45 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Baju Kurung + Berkat = Kendarat
My cousin's wedding this Sunday will be a blast cuz it's my first ever cousin getting married and im so excited to kaypoh kaypoh and help around like a makcik. Hahahaha!! It'll be all so formal with baju kurung and all and it'll be freaking hot. That'll be the only part i dread most. So i'll be missing in action for 2 days or more. I'll update on the happenings and perhap some pictures for those who reads, to look at. Till then, Cheers!
PS : I'm trying to shed some fats off here. Any tips? ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!
she writes at 02:45 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Puncture My Skin
I want to donate blood!! but im scared ;p
she writes at 03:57 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Hold My Head High, Everything Else Except Me Is Worthless.
Shout out to HAFIZ. HAPPY BDAE DEAR FREN. U'RE THE BEST GUY FREN EVER!! Since u're old and no more in the teens, gd luck with the mature lifestyle ahead. No more black tees or messy hairdo. Time to slave for ur country and less grumbles please. ;p
Time flies and im worrying i'll not have enough cash for my best fren's bdae, Tasya. I missed her. Where did you go girl? Oh well, shall wait up for her to be done with school.
My school semester break started like 2 weeks back. More Responsibility was all that sat on my already aching shoulders. Excessive emotions and impulsive eating triggers my inner self. Soon to say, i'll be dead. Self-obsession is destructive and i'm dying. Get the picture? I dont like to point fingers cuz self-blame is always at its highest peak for me. Retail therapy, is the only solution, beside wallowing in self-pity.
Nuff said, other than the sucky part, life's good. With cash flowing in, who says that money can't buy you love. But.... who the fuck is getting love with money? I'm not. Neither am i a prostitute. Trying to save up for my 1 day shopping spree in JB. Gonna shop til i drop dead. Gonna get at least a pair of god-should-know-me-by-now. Shoes of coz! Praying that i'll come back with a hi-cut vans. Been eyeing but just couldn't save enough.
Lastly, I NEED A VACATION!! Hope that daddy will take me somewhere before school reopens. Okay, brain jammed. Words dont flow anymore. Shall end here.
she writes at 02:48 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
If All Else Fails, Just Be Ignorant
I've not been updating and i've got soOo much to say. I shall start by saying that i'm a total loser in whatever i do. I'm losing everyone and everything. Is it me or that people are evil? I guess that leading a life without any worries or care is ideal for me. People stress on thinking about the future, but when i do that, i over-worry.
Just 1 more week before all submissions. Surprisingly this time round, i'm getting the hang of getting my work done before hand. I love it this way. I'm trying to be more organised and hardworking as i dont have to care about anything, anymore. And i love it!
I found a new interest and that is to visit musuems. Weird? I doubt so. Being artsy-fartsy helps me look at things at different perspectives.
Bro said he will be getting a 2nd hand computer from his friend by this week. Hopefully he gets them soon so i can do my work at home instead of using the bloody comp in school. Guess that my life's improving in every aspect but i shall not hope for the best. Cuz there's a saying that ALL GOOD THINGS WILL COME TO AN END and it's damn fucking true.
I need to get new shoes. I've not been buying them for the last 5 months. It's hell not to get shoes. Been eyeing a this green and brown combination Zoo York shoe. Shall try and save to get them.
I don't need a freaking someone now cuz i'm just a total loser. Don't treat me like dirt. I don't hate you so please don't avoid me. All i need is time.
she writes at 06:35 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
My Life
It's too late for new year wishes but heck it. I'm being a lil too emotional nowadays thanks to god-knows-who. Nevertheless, I don't hate the fella. Internet at home is still fucking down so I have to bear and use the web messenger in school. School's now my second home. I breathe, eat, sleep, drink, dream school. Get the point? My life revolve around anything school-related. But at least it'll take my mind off personal problems I'm facing. And being less paranoid as well as over-emotional. I'm delighted to have friends who can comfort and ease my trouble. Perhaps I should be more open to them since I feel that it'll take some weight off my shoulder. Shall try okay my fellow mates. Toodles~!
she writes at 01:09 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Another So Long, It's Gone
What has life got to offer? It's nearly the end of the year and disaster has to occur. Retribution is with me now thanXx to my 'bad' past. Anyhow, life goes on. I'm not thinking about aything else except school and means to improve myself. Strive for the better in simpler words.
"Mass confusion fills my mind and everything still hurts......."
she writes at 01:46 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
So Long........
It's been awhile since i updated. My internet connection at home is down so school's the only choice i've got to check all my important stuffs. Til my internet is back on track, more updating will be done or it'll just be randomness every other time. I miss everyone and yes... the scene toO!!
she writes at 12:34 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Ataris - San Dimas High School Football Rules
"Last night I had a dream that we went to Disneyland
Went on all the rides didn't have to wait in line
I drove you to your house where we stared up at the stars
I listened to your heartbeat as I held you in my arms
We hung out at the rainbow where we drank til' half past two
Nothing could go wrong anytime that I'm with you
Like crashing a hotel room or leading up to that first kiss
Or searching for a high school that you know doesn't exist
These are the things that make me free
I feel like I'm stuck in "stand by me"
This night was too good to be true
Today I woke up alone wishing you were here with me
I wanted us to be something that we'd probably never be
Today you called me up and said you'd see me at our show
But now I'm stuck debating if I even wanna go
Whitney, don't you understand here what I say is true
I just want you to know I have a major crush on you
I'd drive you to Las Vegas and do the things you wanna do
I'd even have Wayne Newton dedicate a song to you
I only wish that this could be
Just dump your boyfriend and go out with me
I swear I'd treat you like a queen"
I'd love to hear your lovely voice again.......
she writes at 01:49 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
October Nights Seem So Cold Without You
It's been awhile since i updated. But who reads this shit anyways? Nevermind.
I'm jobless!! Not exactly jobless, but i don't fucking like the job i got, so i don't turn up. That easy eyy? But it's easy money. Well, i guess i'm not that money minded. I don't give a damn if i'm not rich, which i'm not. Just happy if i'm able to live as the day goes by.
The weather's been freaking cold lately. No amount of blanket can keep me warm. Freaking cold. Brrrr~
Rayer this year will be much more fun than any other years as i've got much more visiting to do. Though no preparations are being made yet, i just want to enjoy the aftermath. Hah! Evil i can say. But i'm sick. Sick of helping out others when they don't seem to see what i've been doing.
Argh!! I miss hanging out. Any takers? I miss all my friends!!
she writes at 12:52 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Miss Me
I'm missing everything. I miss school. I miss doing projects. I miss people. I miss hanging out late. I miss looking at cute guys walk pass me. I miss long ride home. I miss seeing everyone smile for me. I miss people being happy for me. I miss crying. I miss being thin. I miss playing sports. I miss goin on a holiday. I miss having a carefree, non-problematic life. I miss the beach. I miss having so much fun. I miss ME.
she writes at 02:11 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
On Vacation
I'm on vacation now. Fasting month is in 4 days and Hari Raya the following month. Seem like there's not going to be much enjoying this holiday. Nonetheless, I'm still going to have soO much fun doing up my room and sewing baju kurung with my dearest friend, Zim. Can't wait.
I'm addicted to Matchbook Romance, Promise. The lyrics - meaningful. I think I'm going to put in some effort by asking a friend to teach me the guitar. Hopefully, I'll be able to set my fingers and master it by the end of the year. Writing songs are good enough for me. I just love to pen them down whenever free. Too bad they're only for my eyes. I don't publicise my work. Don't think it's good enough though. One day, someday, there'll be someone to play my songs and dedicate them to me. How I wish.......
Been having nightmares of a friend and weird but funny dreams. I didn't wash my feet before going to bed? Nah... don't believe in that. I think, I'm thinking toO much. What did I dream of? I dreamt that I was a professional biker. Hah! Weird right? Nuff said. It's freaky but nice.
she writes at 04:34 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Movies Bite The Truth
Been watching alot of movies lately. The Great Challenge and Resident Evil are awesome! Go catch it for those who haven't seen it yet. It's worth the bucks. The Tony Hawk look-alike in The Great Challenge, whom I've forgotten the name, is a major hottie!! And not forgetting Jill Valentine, the hot chick in Resident Evil. 5 stars for both shows.
Holiday is approaching real soon. After Monday's submission, things will get less hectic. Going shopping this weekend. Can't wait for the holidays so I'm doing it this weekend instead.
Hrm....... Things are getting a little out of hand I guess. I wonder is it me getting paranoid or are people talking behind my back already. I think the latter is a high possibility. For those whom already know, it's not what it may turn out to be. U've all got it wrong. Scenario's much more complicated. It's best to hear it straight from my mouth than anyone else coz I know best. For the many blur ones reading this, the truth will surface someday by itself coz I ain't going to tell. Words spread like a disease and the type changes from one person to another. The outcome varies, and will be a total opposite of the fact. I'm not telling until it's time.......don't ask me when.
she writes at 12:12 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Deadlines With Music Videos
The time when I'm typing this entry reads 03:21 a.m. The point is, 3,2,1 sounds like a wake up call to me. A countdown in simple words. With deadlines nearing and so much assignments to hand in, will I be able to finish them in time? I hope so.
Besides worrying about deadlines, I've found a new hangout place. And that is none other than my studio's Cad Lab. Watching music videos is now my favourite pastime. Hang out there almost every other day when I'm in school. Find me there if you're looking for me. Not only do I enjoy myself watching the videos, but I do pay attention to my assignment which requires me to use the AutoCad programme. Heard of it before? It's tough man!!
Holiday, fasting month and Hari Raya approaching. Can't wait for the first and last one mentioned. Oh well, assignments first then I'll be a free girl.......
she writes at 03:21 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder
This sucks. It'a been 5 long days. The memories are drifting, but the emotions are still intact. Now I know why the absence of someone make the other party leave. They rather not have someone and be lonely, than be alone when their loved one is so far away and couldn't be here for them. Selfish I can say but the truth always hurts.
she writes at 06:02 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Deep Dark Secrets
Alot has happened lately. Everyone's been kept in the dark. I still am literally kept IN the dark. I wish I could pour it all out, but, it's for the good of myself as well as them. The truth will surface by itself one day. Nonetheless, I'm happy the way it is now. Everyone wishes for things to be different, and I am no exception. However, when the wish comes true, they hope for it to return to the way it is.
Been hanging out late again. Not coming back earlier than midnight is partly my routine now. I'm happy, but for how long? I wouldn't want to know.
There's this problem with me. I don't tell any of my problems to my close friends. Not even one. It's not that I don't trust them. It's just that I don't want to burden others with my problems when they have theirs. Am I being selfish? I guess so. Even if they knew, they could perhaps indirectly help, but the problem will always stay with me. Nothing can be done. And I have to thank 'him' for creating the god damn problem. Being cranky at home is not unusual as there's nothing to be cheerful about, except Danish, my cute little shoebox brother (that's what my friend called him, shoebox). The pressure can still be handled, but not for long I guess. My mind and body is slowly decreasing it's content level. Excessive amount of stress is injected....... When will be the end of my problems.......?
she writes at 12:44 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
All's Well
Ok. Revamped! Just need a lil touch to the background and it'll be perfect! Neat?
she writes at 02:32 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Shito~
Fuck man! I do not know where the hell my layout went. It disaapeared somehow. Will redo it. Bear with the plainness for some time. But for now, enjoy the nice background i made. Love Vans!!
she writes at 03:02 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Responsilibity Cum Maturity
Yet another sleepless week due to the countless number of projects with deadlines nearing. Nonetheless,I found time to relax and hang out with my dearest friend. School has always been my first priority followed by my friends and having fun then comes work, which I sometimes dread.
If I had a choice, I wouldn't want to work at all, or would have stopped long ago, but I can't. I have my responsibilities to fulfill. At such a young age with soO much responsibilities setting in, I hope that I'm able to take the blow one day. All this responsibilities made me realise that I'm very mature now when in comes to all aspects of life. Be it in family matters, matters concerning friends, school or even matters of the heart. I'm glad to have that sense of maturity setting inside me now as I know that I'm ready to handle any situation that's bound to happen sooner or later [set aside the blur side of me]. Although that sense of fear is there, I know that there is a kind soul out there 'watching' and taking care of me and I treasure you alot. If there are bound to be unhappiness, it'll only make me treasure you more. And with that, I'll leave with a qoute for all to think about.
Maturity begins to grow when you can sense your concern for others outweighing your concern for yourself
she writes at 02:39 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Summary
Been hanging out lately. Had the best Sunday ever. Cramped with school assignments and projects. Sleepless nights. Long telephone conversations on everything. In love with Story Of The Year - Anthem Of Our Dying Days. And as well as SOTY's bassist. Said to be anorexic, which definitely isn't true to me. Cashless. Contented. Happy. Dreamy. Clumsy. Blur. Smiling always.
she writes at 05:33 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Sweetness
You influence my life very much. I don't know if I should tell you this. I think I would rather wait for you to tell me. And both of us will smile ;) I would. Would you?
she writes at 03:21 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
I'm Lovin' It
she writes at 12:57 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Beauty Palour
My studio space has turned into a beauty palour. Yes, u read it right. Manicure and straightening of hair. Did my nails. It's black, and the tip has two-tone design. Love it! I bet it won't last anyway. Can't wait for friday. Having a pit with the kids. There's gonna be lotsa food. Yum Yum!!
I hate it when people call out my name and then look elsewhere. You thing it's funny? NOT! Don't be childish. Grow up man y'all.
It's been awhile since I updated. Well, just expressing my feelings and what recently happened. Nothing more for now. Will update more next time. Keep on tagging people!
she writes at 01:42 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
1/10 IAD & Remedy
Yup, my designer buddies. Too bad it's onli 1/10 of them. Put them all together n u'll get a noisy pack - the most happening diploma.
Remedy
A group picture taken wif my orientation buddies.
she writes at 01:16 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
For Better For Worse
Whenever i talk to u, my mind goes blank. It's not that u are boring. It's just that u make me feel relaxed n away from all the stress n problems piling on me, almost crushing my brain n the excessive intake of paracetamol. The problem is, u pressure me too. U pressure me with all the subjects wic i avoid most. Be patient. Let nature take its course. I assure u that time will tell everything. When u expressed ur feelings, i was surprised, as i almost lost hope on u. I just can't stop thinking if u're just using me as your toy. If u go away, will u do what u always do, like u told me before. If u are, then forget about even taking a step ahead. If u're willing to change, wic i wun force u to, then i'd be happy. There's no point forcing u to change as it will only be a reflection of you being me. Dun change for me, but change for ur own self. But if u're a second too slow, i'd already be gone as i can't stay for long knowing that u wun change for neither me nor urself. U're gettin to know me well enough n i'm doing the same about u too. I know that writing all this is useless, cuz u wun even read it. If u ever do, i'm just tellin u that i'm here if u ever need me. I'll be the one who'll see u thru, even if it'll take me a mile to go over. Cuz i noe that we're world's apart. Hope to see u on thurs.
she writes at 12:42 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
First Impressions Lasts
Do you remember the day we first met? Coz i did. Our first hello. Our first goodbye. It was a day i'd never forget.
It's been awhile since i last called u. Hearing your voice made me ponder. Why am i doing this to u? U did absolutely nothing n i left u stranded. Guess it's just that same-old-bitchy-me fluid running thru my veins. I'm sorry for not calling. I guess i missed u, just like i missed everyone else.
And then there's another. Since u left, it's been raining. Was it an expression of me crying? U left without a word. No goodbyes, nothing at all. When i spoke, all u did was nod. Are u trying to say something? Try harder then. When u said u didn't mind, i was willing to try. Till den, nothing happened. What's wrong here? I'm just waiting for ur return. Who knows what might happen.
Like i always love to say, People change thru time. The time here, refers to over a period of time. One cant change within a split second. Somehow, it takes a lifetime for most of us to see thru ourselves n realise that our life wasn't fulfilled in the best way possible. Every move we make or every word we say, is actually observed or heard by someone. When we say or do something, ALWAYS think of the consequences. Even the slightest word we use, may hurt someone's feelings. The power of language is very strong although there is a saying that Action speaks louder than words. So, the next time u wanna say or do something, THINK! U may neva know tt u'll leave a bad impression on someone.
she writes at 03:26 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
I Miss My Comp!!
I miss my computer! Have not been updating as my internet is down. Hence, no point in touchin my lousy-dumb-ass computer. ThanXx to all who have been readin my blog n for taggin! Continue to tag k pple.... i lurve y'all!! Sorie if i dun reply to ur tag cuz i'm using dial-up. So muz limit my usage.
School's in and i've been damn bz for the past 4 weeks. Stress man! Everything's about school now. Assignments n projects are piling in!! Damn it!! Less social time for me. If ani one of u wanna ask me out, juz gimme a beep. I'll try to slot u in my hectic-gile-babi schedule. Heh!
Not fair!! My friend has departed for Bali today. He's going there to surf for a week!! How cool is tt!! He's got so much leisure time. No school or family probs to worry bout. How i wish i am in his shoes. Gonna miz u man...
Just went shopping today!! Spent bout $60 bux on 6 items. 3 t-shirts, a bag ,cap n a pair of shoe. Didn't buy Vans tho! Support Vans!!! I lurve tt brand to the core!!
This entry is very 'anihow-typed-one'. Sorry for the lousy language. A shout out to all.... "Join TP Design school! Very fun! Heh!! N support VANS!!!"
she writes at 10:07 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Fresh New Start
Sorry to all who may have been reading my blog n found tt i've not been updating it. Who reads my blog neways?
Been really busy with school. Bear with my long entry as there's soO much to write on. On the 16th - 19th june, i had my orientation. I thot it was going to be really boring, wic it did at first, but my perspective changed on alot of things after the whole orientation ended. 4 days may seem long at first but 4 days itself wasn't enough becoz i had lotsa fun n wanted more. There was some sort of cheer competition, games n lots more. Cheer normally means 'stupid' to me. But it was really fun when team mates get together n do a cheer for all to see, tho we screwed up on the last day.
The 1st day was quite boring with the long dreading talk by a lecturer. But it got fun later on when we learnt the mass dance. i practically danced anyhow. heh!
2nd day was more to games n obstacle courses. FUN! F-U-N! My empire was superb but gettin 4th place was not convincing as we did our best. We got all wet n sweaty. It was fun n it was my first tym bathing in school.
3rd day was the best among all. Dance, cheer, n more games, but the last event we had was a blast. We had a party. More lyk a clubbing scene in school. We danced to the lights n sounds of R&B. Ya, surprisingly i danced to those songs. Weird but FUN! Got drenched as the seniors poured water from the level above us. But it was all part of the fun.
4th day was the final clash. Played water bomb but i practically stayed away from those attackers as i forgot to bring extra pants along. I still got a lil wet tho. My side of the team won. Yey! By the end of the whole orientation, my empire bonded so well. My empire got 2nd but 1st for our side of the team, wic is East side. Weeeeeeee~
So muc effort was put in for our orientation n i had superb fun. Alot had been learnt n maybe next year i'll be one of the seniors organising the orientation for the juniors. Can't wait! But i'll haf to pass thru dis yr first.
Oh yah, today's my first day at school. It was fun. Doesnt seem so routined lyk scondary school at all. Love it! Hopefully by the end of the semester im not so stressed out cuz i heard tt my course is realli fun but tough too. Neway, wic design course isnt stressful?
she writes at 02:23 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
N i wish i am. Nothing will seem to work out between us. Can't we be more than just friends? I really am clueless about what's going thru your mind. Who is she to u? N who am i to u? If u're really serious about her, then y me? Making more friends isn't wrong, but at least give me a hint that u're still with her. I'll be hurt but the pain will heal sooner or later. At least i know i can move on, for every other one is just a temporary substitute of u. I'm not over u, till i get the idea tt u wanna be nothing more than just friends.
The other seems complicated. Y am i always blowing my top over minor things when talking to u? Is it u or am i beginning to fall for u? U'll always be a mystery, for i'm not prepared to face u. It's not tt i dun wanna face u, but i'm afraid u'll get hurt bcoz of me. I'm a bitch n i think u know. Or u either haven't known me well enough to see my true colours. Let's keep it as a mystery for the both of us for the time being. Someday, somehow, we'll get to see the mystery reveal right in front of our eyes n hope tt it's much more than just fantasies. In other words, there's much more to life than meets the eye.
she writes at 01:03 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Star Talk
she writes at 02:30 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Gimme A Break
I'm denying everything tt is going on in my life. N i mean EVERYTHING, just like the button up there. The fact is, i cant hold on to the truth. Whenever i think about it, tears will flow. I just hope tt i dun get a breakdown one of these days. But i'll never know.
I seriously need a break. Not just any ordinary break but a holiday to somewhere peaceful, calm, quiet..... u get what i mean, to let my mind rest. A friend once asked if i wanted to go on a one day trip to surf. Not in S'pore tt is. It'll be my first time n it'll be so fun! But the prob is, i cant get outta S'pore when my passport is being kept by my mom. Maybe i'll steal it from her. Steal to get a peace of mind? How ironic can tt be. Just wish me luck tt i'll be able to go someday, somehow.......
I really need to meet up with him for the very first and last time (not exactly first la) before he goes all the way to be a super-duper cop. N maybe i wanna ride on his baby too. The setting would be so nice n i wouldn't want the day to end, i hope. Heh! I dont care about what u'all think of him, cuz he's got the charm. The charm which made me attracted to him. But then again....... is the other one right for me, or is he better? God, please give me a clue. Any clue will do. At least i'll know i did the right thing.
she writes at 02:13 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Confused~
Grrr~ Whenever u try so hard to forget someone, he just comes back without any warning. I tried so hard to keep him from crawling into my mind n heart, but once more he somehow seem to read me. There he is once again, capturing my heart without the slightest lift of a finger. The risk involved....... gettin hurt all over again though i very well know i would be. Seems like im out here to destroy myself. I just cant help it. The sight of him - IRRESISTABLE. Sometimes, i just cant understand myself. No one will. Why get involved when u know u're gonna get hurt? Is it the thrill or something else? Whatever it is, i know im not giving up. Gonna wait till u have a change of heart. Maybe the wait is not worth it n i would be the one with a change of heart. Dont keep me waiting for my mind is very fickle.
PS: i lurveee the stars on your baby.......
she writes at 01:22 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Long Weekends~
Sorry for disappearing. It's been hell of a wkend. Last Sat went for Ira's chalet at pasir ris. Overnight there, but didn't sleep at all. Got to watch the sunset n the sunrise. It was my first time watchin the sunrise. It was beatiful, magnificent, awesome, words simply cant describe the view. The night n morning was spent with taysa, farn, fye, dan n din n we did some 'ghost-hunting', star gazing, chilling at nowhere, playin 'truth or dare' n exploring some other places. It was great fun! N i saw a friend of mine just two chalet away from ours. Didn't really think tt i would see him this close. Missed him. Alot.
On Sunday, went over to my aunt's chalet at east coast. Overnight there, again. Was so exhausted from the previous night tt i spent my time at the chalet sleepin instead of havin more fun. Was suppose to go to work the following day, which is a Monday, but i came up with some excuse cuz i was too tired. Was still at the chalet on Monday. Cycled along the beach with my couz. It's been awhile since i last cycled n my muscles ached. It's been a wkend of fun, fun n more fun! Wish to do tt sometime again... n soon! There are pictures of the chalet thing, but i'm too lazy to link it up. Heh! Maybe next time? Nah~
A change of environment. Tryin to adapt. I'm currently lovin' it! My colleagues are great. More like superb! The new place is less tiring but abit dizzy. The hours are longer but environment wise, it's more flexible n comfortable.Like what i've said earlier.... I'M LOVIN' IT!
she writes at 12:18 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Happy Birthday IRA!!!
Firstly, HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY IRA!!! MwahXx!!! HugXx!!! KissXx!!!
I'm so happy. 17th May, Monday, marks the day when he first talked to me. Call me silly, but, I love it when people take the initiative, rather than me being the one who always does it. Love his guts!
she writes at 02:25 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Exposed!
Here's a lil something down memory lane. My primary school crush. And yes, he's a chinese. This picture was taken a month back after my secondary school band concert. He's still as good looking as ever.
Looking like a couple ;p
she writes at 04:20 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Smile!
Did u all watch Dawn Of The Dead? Freaky gile! If u haven't seen it yet, go catch it!
Work's been great so far. Been day-dreamin while admiring a friend from afar. I shouldn't hope too much cuz things wouldn't work out like always. Whatever happens, I would still be admiring from a distance.
Ever wondered how some people whom u don't know at all, knows alot about u? Well, maybe not alot but talks about u though u've never met tt someone? I do n get tt alot. I'm not talkin bout u, but speaking for myself as well. We tend to admire someone from afar, get to know more about the person from a friend of his or hers n then try to make not-too-hard of an impression just so tt tt someone will notice u. The fear of rejection is always there in everyone n none can deny it. A simple Hi, Hello or just a smile would make someone's day, but sometimes the other party don't realise tt. U never know what u'll get in this unpredictable world cuz the person whom u think is sombong, kerek or whatever u may wish to call them, might think the same about u. So the next time u see someone interesting, just say Hi or smile at them. Then both party would be happy! So, the next time u see me on the streets, just say Hi or smile n u'll make my day.
U'll just have to look at the finer details in life!
she writes at 01:12 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Cheap Thrills
And i mean what i say.
It seems like no one ever take a second glance anymore. Environment have changed, so did i. But the pple ard me, u never seem to change, not even a lil. I'm pissed n upset with the fact tt it cant change n never will. I'm sick n tired of all tt sweet talk n making me believe tt there's hope. From now on, everyone is equal in my perspective. No point hating as i'll end up the loser.......
I've spent a bomb on myslf once again. Bought tops, pants n shoe. Nonetheless, i lurve it n i'm Happy!
Oh yuh, HAPPY BURFDAE BRO!!
she writes at 01:40 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Bluergh~
The month of MAY. With so lil cash n so many presents to get, i'll be left with nothing but empty stomachs for the rest of the month. Seem like i wun be gettin tt purple Vans shoe or a trip to Malaysia to view n perhaps buy a Vans shoe dere. I'm so in love with Vans, so my birthday next year, send me trucks of Vans items. Ergh! Hate having no cash. Do donate me some if u have a kind heart ok. Ok, tt's all for now. I need my sleep.
she writes at 02:00 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Disastrous~
I'm abit slow in updating bout the news. Oh heck, i experienced it okay!
And so, the news was spread within minutes. For those who haven't heard bout it, where were u? Nicole Highway collapsed la dey...How can u not know? So 20th April marks the day. Somehow, I 'experienced it'. Yes, I did. Ya, I did, but just the blackout. Heh! Was at work at Suntec when the whole mall suddenly went black. The sounds of Monique Powell in the boutique was gone. Damn! A commotion was heard. "What happened? What happened?" The same question was heard repeatedly in Suntec. Everyone came out from their offices and gathered in groups. News indeed travel fast in a kpo cum kiasu country. My first reaction. Shocked. Who wouldn't? I thought S'pore IS a safe country. Now... I'm gettin all worried. Is it still safe? Just hope nothing like this would happen again. But then again, having the blackout was fun!
Some things never change. Having my parents around makes no different when they aren't. I know I'm old enough n I have to be independent. But for this matter, aren't my parents suppose to see me through n help me with an important decision n not leave me on my own to struggle n complete it. I NEED their guidance. They never know n never will. They never seem to understand on what I need guidance on n what I don't. They see me like any ordinary teenager who goes through the phrase of life where it involves drugs, love, sex, lie, disobedience n all tt bullshit just to name a few. What they don't see, is ME. I AM WHO I AM. U just can't change the fact tt I'm this n I'm tt. What they think of me are all lies. The truth lies in me but they'll have to try harder to see the lights of it. I've tried n wanted to open up, but the fact is, I'm too scared n I can't. They'll never know tt I can handle it all by myself, cuz I did handle all tt I'd ever wanted by myself without them knowing. See where I am now. I made it. N now on the road to success. The fact is.......they can't see tt i made it through. Cuz the lie tt has been with me throughout the years have not been known. I might just tell them one day tt I've found U n hope tt they'll like u, n not think tt u're just like any of them. The problem now is, I'm not too sure of myself if U r what I'm lookin for. But I'll just try settling down knowing tt u'll make me smile.
Some of u might be wondering what the hell I'm talking bout. I don't like expressing my personals out, tt's y I'm talking in circles. Maybe I'll just sum it up in simpler words. I'm not happy with what's going on around the house. I can't handle it no more.......
she writes at 01:26 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
??Purple Or Green??
A decision made in weakness,
left me in a stranded triangle.
Which two will I leave?
And which one will I pick?
Only time will tell.......
But is it time yet?
Cuz I seem to be running out of it.......
she writes at 12:36 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
This Is How I Feel.......
I'm in
she writes at 12:11 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Missing U.......
I'm missing U badly.
My heart races each time I see ur face.
I can't hold my tears no more.
Knowing that U will never be a part of me.
I need U here by my side.
I want a ride and hold U tight.
And never leave U.
I wanna be with U all night.......
she writes at 01:15 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
I'm Back! But Shattered.......
Miss going online n updating dear diary. Hah! Alot has happened lately. Words simply can't describe how I feel n STILL AM feeling. I don't wish to continue hoping, for I simply n truly know that what i'm hoping for is just a false hope. Nuff said, heart brokened, shattered.
To whom it may concern, u left me breathless at first sight, n now u leave me gasping for more just to get thru each day with me trying to erase the fact that I never would have want to know. I am nothing compared to the one with u.......
A piece of my heart will always be with u.......
she writes at 01:10 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Please Be Patient
Sorry for MIA. My internet can't be used at the moment. Will update once it's back. Miss u pple loads!
she writes at 06:25 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Finally~
I DID IT!
Yup! And so, I passed my GCE O'Levels. I'm happy that i've passed, but disappointed that I didn't get any A's, or just an A for Design & Techonology, my fave subject you can say so, which I was aiming for. Nevertheless...
English - B3 (Woohoo! Didn't expect though I had the same grade for Prelims)
Combined Humanities - B4 (WoW Wee! 4 yrs of constant F9 to a B4! How great!)
E.Maths - C6 (Phew! At least I passed!)
Science
Design & Techonology - B3 (Gosh! Disappointed! Was hoping to get at least an A! I think I screw the theory part. Or was it my pathetic artefact...)
Malay - B4 (Retook. C5 to a B4. Improvement made!)
Happy! Pleased! Contented! Thank God I didn't screw up my O's. Or else...... Go figure out......
she writes at 12:09 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Fingers Crossed~
There's NO WAY OUT. Take my hand. We'll make it. I swear. I hope... I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Will tears of joy or disappointment show? Will the stretch of fence still be there? I hope to climb over it and see the other side, the one beyond the fence. I wanna reach a greater height, to another level that is. I wanna explore the unknown side which had always been a mirage, hallucination, dream, or whatever u and I might call it. Till then, i'm still keepin my fingers crossed, for better or for worse, for better I hope once again.
So that's it. The news trembled me to break down close to tears. FRIDAY. A day of joy or sorrow? I'll have to wait patiently, nervously, reluctantly. ARGH! TAKUT GILE! *fingers crossed*
The feeling of being embraced had me feeling secured as well as insecured. Is it what I want? Do I really need it? It is worth the pain & joy? I did feel wanted. I was feeling in need. Saw another. Felt confused. This or the other? Time. All I need is more time to think it through. I shouldn't rush and make a rash decision, and end up regretting. But then again, we have one life. Live it to the fullest!
she writes at 10:49 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Bang!
woah! what's wif my title? was stuck wif work n couldn't see dear Sya n of coz my best buddy, Fiz, perform at marina yest. sorie!
now im stuck wif work, work n more work. the good thing is... i'll have money to spend by the start of next month. but... workin for me is more of a saving n settling bills, n less on shopping. so the next tym u wanna buy something, think of me. i appreaciate little things, wif or w/o a reason or occasion. heh! ok, knock my head.
hrm, let me grumble to all of u bout dis auntie or rather nonya at my work plc. she nags n nags bout the lil things. unless u find something interesting to talk to her (wic i cant find any topic to talk to a nonya), she'll haf tt sour plum face. so what if she worked there longer than me. tt's no bloody excuse to say tt i'm new n all tt. hrmfp!!
except for tt nonya, everione is great. my friends dere r merepek. the chefs, tak habis habis kacau me.
ok the end. heh! ran outta words...
she writes at 11:56 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Don't Control Me
just read the icons from left to right. get it?
she writes at 09:04 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
MmMmM~
sorie for MIA these few days. been busy. so i'll summarise bout what happened the past few days, or rather last wk.
12th feb, mama's b'dae. had home-made steak. it was delicious! yummy yum yum!
fri the 13th. a day filled wif fun n laughter. met up wif shammie at her school, NYP, for the open house. it seemed more like a funfair! after tt went sheesha-ing wif a wacky buncha pple. tasya, yatie, sya, min, nurul, hanis, mai, syikin, sofyn, rye + shammie n me! a few puffs n i got my usual headache. smoke aint for me at all! heh!
14th feb, valentine's day. a day which starts to be my routine from then on. the plc is great, the FOOD is great, the pple are great, esp the chefs. they are full of crap! kekek, should say. ahahaha! took 14 roses home. 7 red n 7 light pink ones. love it! too bad it didnt last long enough.
okay, so i've summed evrything up into a short one. enough said already.
im not contented till i get what i am looking for, but for now, i'll pretend everything is alright...
she writes at 10:38 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Exhausted~
i'll update soon. im juz exhausted~
she writes at 12:45 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
.Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow.
everyone has something to do n something to look foward to each day. mine's nothing special. i just hope to find myself alive n kickin every single day. going through n lettin time pass with nothing more than routines, thoughts filled my head, maybe tomorrow. i hope so. when will it stop? hope i'll get it. am i the only one? everyone complains n so do i. all i need is a lil warmth. hug me. or lend me a shoulder will u?
she writes at 03:04 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Saturday Night
saturday was great! last min decision to go out. met up wif shammie (at last!). bought stuffs n shammie 'sponsored' my belt as a b'dae gift! thanXx babe! she was chatty. i lurve it! i cud ask for nutin more than a chatty fren.
met up wif min after her work. n then there were 3. did sum window shoppin n visited tasya dearest at her work place. kesian grrl. kerja keras tak dapat duduk. takper nanti dapat pay lagi, happi happi jgn lupe me. heh! after tt we met up wif gorgeous sya at somerset. from afar she looked like a model! so now there were 4. walked to PS n sat down at mac to haf ice-cream. yakkin n yakkin bout stuffs n soon enuff, bout animals. how weird! went to spotlight n tried on sum props. *snap snap*, goes sya's cam. will b up soon on her blog i guez. the piXx were hilarious, but it was fun!
then blah blah blah, we went to esplanade (my hot-spot). there was a funfair goin on but din take ani rides nor went upclose. i guez it muz haf been expensive. had one of those grrls talk. sya's 'story' was hilarious!!
it was gettin late n we decided to go our separate ways home. i met up wif tasya n aman, hu went for the Plain Sunset last gig. no tix for me so i din go. took train back to tamp n walked home wif tasya. it's been awhile since i walked home wif her. im straight ok. dun tink too muc!
all im hopin for now is to get a job. waitin for a call. hire me soon pls! im gettin bored n running outta cash!
see u grrls on fridae i suppose. cant wait!
she writes at 12:47 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Open Ur House For Me!
todae was tiring. alot of things happened. i thot it was a last min decision to cancel the visit to ngee ann's n sp's open houz but i was wrong. farna had a headache n thank u she stil wanna go to the open houses. we first went to ngee ann's n walked ard to get brochures for courses. saw min. she was cute in skewl U. heh! gettin from one campus to another was hell! so we decided not to tour the whole of ngee ann n head straight for sp. before our departure to sp, it rained! thank u, dere was a free shuttle bus to sp. weeeee..... free ride!!
sp was worse than ngee ann. sorrie but no offence to those skoolin dere. business skool in sp, where is it located? up a hill. luckily dere were free shuttle buses! i lurve freebies! heh!! saw rye. thanXx rye for the info. appreaciate it! ira joined us along the way as she wanted to check out, urm... the plc? heh! u noe wut i mean grrl! ;P farna ditched us to go back hm. ahahaha!! u tac kare grrrl, jgn frown ok! after all the rain n free bus rides, headed for orchard. ate alot i tink. tt's a 1st from anorexic me. tt's wat ira said i am. saw a nice belt but din get it as it wasnt wat i was lookin for rite now. i nid to watch my budget pple. after tt, rushed to find a pair of shoes for me. nid it urgently. more lyk desperately. moz shops were closed really early todae. according to ira, it was the last day of CNY n the chinese had sumtin to do on the last day. issit? i duno, tho im half chinese! ignorant me! bought a ring. nice n simple! wanted to get more, but had to watch my budget. ken sumone get for me more? heh! found it! my pair of shoes. lyk ballet cum skool shoes. ahahaha! weeeeeeeee..... i lyk, no i lurve it! ok so next, we rushed hm! wanted to catch american idol, the moz happenin show, i tink. it's funnie to laugh at those wannabes, hu tink dey ken make it.
at tamp, 2 guys stopped me. no dey werent policemen. n no i din do anitin wrong. y be scared wen im innocent. ahaha! neways, 2 of these guys wanted to make frens. arrr.. frenly pple. so heck it. juz made 2 frens todae!
ok done! it was a tiring day! onli ting i summed it up, if not i wud take the whole day tellin the details.
oh ya, piXx of the day will b up soon. courtesy of ira's cam.
she writes at 12:31 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Confused~
hrm... that is what i should do n follow. rite?
she writes at 01:42 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Weeeeeeeee~
Happie 17th Burfdae To ME! Swit 17 eyy?! heh!
she writes at 12:51 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
I Ended It
i lurve happy endings
i cant deny
im in a state-of-regretion
why oh why...
y am i so stupid
to make tt mistake
n now i go regreting
or shud i forsake?
yea screw me. screw the universe...
she writes at 03:15 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Pain-t Me~
You are the one who holds back your feelings from
others and yourself. You dont want to show
people your weak u dont want sympathy. Your
strong but maybe... you should show ur
feelings, just alittle*
The type of pain ur eyes behold
brought to you by Quizilla
woah! dis is sOOooO true. freaky tho~
she writes at 01:12 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Dilemma~
ok, so the theory to everyting is tt, wen u want sumtin, no one wans u. but wen u seem to lose hope, dey come attackin u lyk flock of birds.
got a dilemma for jobs. went for an interview todae for a job tt i seek a wk ago. but on the same todae, another company called n ask if i was stil interested in the job. tis tym it's a 2 wk ago job tt i seek. so the pay for the 2 wk ago job is betta. the other 2 jobs wic i appplied for yest, i tink i'll put it on hold n hope tt the 2 wk ago job wil take me in, cuz the pay's the best among all. heh! i juz hope for one ting, n tt is... hope im not jobless by the end of dis dilemma... *sigh*
she writes at 05:27 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Bah~!
your asshole.
What swear word are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
ok, so im an asshole. ahahahaha! heck it!
yest n today was gr8! ate the bbq & steamboat ting 3 tyms. nope, i dun tink i've grown ani fatter tho i ate muc. din celebrate CNY dis yr, last yr, or the yr b4 tt due to sum personal probs. well, no hong baos for 3 consecutive yr. no big deal neway.
did u pple realise tt spore becomes a ghost town during CNY? the streets r so qiuet n eerie, esp at nyte. shops r closed n wut r the malays n indians suppose to do? dey either sit at hm n rot or dey flood the beaches. cant wait til sat wen all the shops wil open for biznes again~
she writes at 02:15 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Weeeeeeeee~
yup! weeeeeeeee~! went out wif mom, dad n danish. went to parkway parade to buy a new bbq & steamboat set to replace the old & greasy one. the one wic we bought was betta. the top cud be removed to wash it, instead of juz wiping it wif scottex tissue or wateva u call it. can hardly wait! CNY eve, tt is tmr, wen we'll use the new set. gonna haf a feast tmr! superb! cant wait!! *drools* mom invited Yatie over. weeeeeeeee.... a guest, or rather my soon-to-be sis-in-law?! hehZz!! gr8! cant wait for the feast. cant wait to ask yatie on how's her new job. cant wait for everyting! hehz! im so impatient!
ouh well, found lotsa piXx of my darling seann william scott!! will post one onli tho... hehZz!
dere u haf it. it's soOooO true! dude he's so gorgeous! hehZz! but wut's wif the pg no. tho... maeb i lurveEeEe him 174 tyms, tt y! but it's more than tt! *grins* tee-hee!!
she writes at 10:59 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
HOT!!
woah!! im meltin.... i feel in lurve wif dis pic the moment i saw it. boy is he HOT!! curently runnin as my 2nd darling. hehZz!! now i nid to go n find my Seann William Scott!! hehZz!!
she writes at 02:33 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Quizzes
cudn't tink of anitin to write so i did sum quiz instead. here are the results:
Which Daughters of the Moon Character are You?Find out!
wow weee~! i lurvee catty! i used to lurvee readin tt book.
Are You Crazy??Find out!
well... i thot i was nuts. but den the quiz proved me wrong. but den again, it's juz a fuckin quiz!
What Nervous Habit are You? Find out!
eyy.. me, attention seeker? ahaha!!
Which Holiday are YOU? Find out @ RelentlessDivas.Net!
ouh boy, st valentine's day comin. haven got a date. heh hehZz!! ouh heck!! ani takers? ahahahahaha!!
What's Your Personality?Find out!
urmmm... i dun always say the right tings. innocent? well, maeb baby. ahahahahaha!! ok enuff quizzes for the day. dun dey haf a quiz on 'r u depressed?' hehZz!
she writes at 02:27 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Setting Her Free.....
the meanin finally dawned on me todae, after yrs & yrs of assuming wut it realli meant. it applies to all kind of tings n not onli the unassuming ting called lurve. fuck it...
responsibility, responsibilty & more responsibility. hate tt word. everytym it comes into my life, i try to avoid, escape n run away. the fact is, i cant. it wud onli take hold of my hand n i wud patiently as well as pathetically walk wif it, knowin well enuff tt it will actually unleash the devil in me. no one knows. no one will ever hear nor listen to the silent cry constantly repeating. the sudden outburst r heard den ignored, not knowing tt the one suffering nids to b set free...
will onli one realise after losing sumtin so precious? if everyting is soo easy n are suppose to b tt way, wut's the point of holding on to hope...
she writes at 10:29 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Punctuality Test
a day went wrong. thanXx to myself for failin my punctuality test. was suppose to go to Toni & Guy at the riverwalk. had to be at 10am. i woke up n 9am. wut else?! rushed lyk mad. reached the plc 45mins later. dere was no plc for me dere to do my hair. grrrrr~!! was told to come back at 2pm instead, but i cant due to sum personal stuffs. the grrl hu asked me to come down was nice enuff to let me haf my hair done stil, but after CNY. yay? juz hope i wont b late next tym. i wud b waitin for her call den. get me an alarm clock?!?! ahahahahaha!! no thanXx! i haf so mani but hate using them. heh hehZz!
since i did not get my hair done, i had nutin betta else to do than to take the bus (dis tym to sumwhere), parkway parade n shop. paid cash for the bus fares. the tiXx, i folded it into hearts. hehZz! lyk old tyms. betta start savin soon cuz the bloody bus fare is so eX!! take a few trips, my ez-link is runnin low. cant use the concession cuz the fella say im not skoolin. wat the heck man! i shud stop dis nutin-betta-else-to-do attitude. everytym i haf dis attitude, i wud spend my money. ok la, at least it's sum neccessary stuffs. bought a earring, food, nail polish remover. ahahahaha!! lame stuffs i guez! yest, went out wif ira n woohoo!! i bought a converse high-cut shoe for onli 30bucks! worth a bargain man!! n a purple top for 5bucks! at last... a purple top.
see the tym written for dis entry? it's 02.22 p.m. i tink im so fated wif the no.2 my burfdae's 2nd feb. meanin, 02/02. wahseh, lyk dis the no.2 shud b my fave no. now. heh hehZz!!
she writes at 02:22 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Chameleon?
im scared~! scared tt my hair wud turn out lyk shit!! or turn out lyk a monkey!! juz wish me luck! if it turn out lyk shit, i'll juz turn myself into a chameleon n blend in wif the surrounding. im a LIZARD r'ber. heh hehZz!!
she writes at 12:32 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Rude Grrrl's Fun Day
if u're tinkin wat the hell my headin meant, no! im not a rude grrrl. no offence to rude grrrls! it's juz tt i had to b 1 for the day. dress code: formal. tt was wut my hopeful job turn out to b. it was my 1st day, but onli as an observer, to see wut the job offers. lukin lyk a rude grrrl n walking the mile from Paya Lebar to Aljunied wasnt the least bit fun wen u had a pair of shoes compressin ur feet completely. blisters n painful toes, dey ache lyk hell. the pain on my big toe, reminded me of my netball days, wen boff of my big toe nails came off. the pain? unbearable! the painful walkin wasnt fun at all, but my team leader, hu's a chinese n he's realli charmin (heh hehZz!!), cracked jokes n made my day. w/o his guide n his clowny attitude, the day wudnt luk bright at all! i wanted to go back halfway, but the thot of leavin tt charmin team leader, was such en evil ting to do. ahahahahaha!! im crappin here.
yea, so after the whole so-called job, was suppose to mit dear tasya at her work plc, but thanXx to me for not takin the train, i ended up on a 2hr bus trip to nowhere n landed home instead. imagine 2hrs of bus ride where u noe u're headin for a destination but u neva seem to reach. grrrr!! hate it wen tt happens. oh well!
everywhere i went, i had stares. stares from everyone. dey mite b tinkin on 3 possible factors:
1: am i a chinese or a malay? 2: am i a student or an adult? (thanXx to my dressin!) 3: wunder hu hired me for havin a weird sense of dressin n attitude? (nails painted black, listenin to sum form of loud music n dressin so formally)
well, most of u dun find it weird, so do i, but adults stare at me lyk as if im sum alien from kuku land. ahahahahaha!! for now, i'll take my leave. i nid to haf a gd rest. feelin drained for being out so early in the mornin w/o havin muc rest. poor feet of mine....
she writes at 01:49 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Gimme A Heading
erk! im runnin outta headings for my entries. heh heh!! my youngest bro, Danish, pinched my right jaw yesterday. gosh! it's so painful! dere's a mark on my right jaw now. how shud i describe it as. it's 3 dots tt make up a triangle. try imaginin a predator laser being point at my face! if u dun get the pic nehmind. i'll try to get a pic of it. it luks kinda kewl tho. ahahahahaha!! pple mite tink tt my bf bite me. ahahahahahaha!! well, i dun haf one so stop tinkin the untinkable. i dun nid one neways. dey'll onli suffocate me. heh hehZz!! i mite b lying here.
one day, Danish wud turn into a fottballer. y i say tt? cuz he's always seen kickin a ball wen he notices one. ok, not juz a ball. anitin. n i mean anitin. he juz kick his soiled pampers!! he's an avid soccer fan i guez. he'll b singapore's ronaldo, or david beckham. no no!! i wan him to b lyk raul!! he's hot, talented n ouh hot! did i say hot?! ahahahahaha!! im tinkin too far. ok pardon my lameness. at least i dun try too hard to impress pple, n being such a snobbish bitch, tryin to get the attention of pple. ouh well! shan't bother bout those kinda pple.
grrrr!! my wallpaper cant b seen by others cuz it's blocked by the whole purple tingy. help me out sumone!! i've tried means n ways, but nutin seems to work out. nutin ever seems to work out! ok i shall shut my brain n stop typin now. gotta haf a gd rest. tmr will b a hectic day, tryin to get a job. yep job huntin again. dis tym. no gd lucks for me. it shall b break a leg? ahahahahaha!! ok shall update on my job huntin mission tmr, ok maeb the day after, or whenever im free. cheers!
she writes at 11:15 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Weeeeeeee~
another tirin but fun day. had lotsa fun wif farna. job hunting turned out to be more lyk a shoppin spree! heh heh!! if onli i had more money to spend. the fun came wen boff of us had nutin betta to do n we decided to paint our nails wif everi nail polish tester available. each of our nails had a diff color on. it was so nice n cool! we onli appllied for 1 job. the rest were full. i juz hope i get the job. *fingers crossed*. betta slp early dis tym as tmr will be another exciting day. gonna play pool at pavilion wif farna. i bet im gonna make lotsa mistake playin pool. hehz! well, i guez if i get tt job, anione care to join me for a shoppin spree? heh heh!! muz get first la Liza! so, ken the piXx b seen now?!?!
she writes at 08:54 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Grrrrr!!
grrrrr!! im frustrated. y cant the piXx show up? darn! nvm la, i'll juz keep tryin means n ways to let those freakin piXx show up eventually one day.
im suppose to b slpin rite now, as im on a mission wif farna tmr, but my fingers are juz itching (err..got such word?) to touch the keyboard. my mission tmr is to job hunt tt is. hope i'll get one by the end of the day. wish me luck eyy!!
a tiring but enjoyable day. played 2-on-2 soccer wif my younger bro n couzXx under the blk. ahahahaha!! yea, a grrl playin soccer, i noe. well, i mized my childhood days wen i always play wif my elder bro n his buncha frens. n im always the onli grrl wen it comes to soccer. i simply lurvee it. anione care to form a team wif me? hehez!! yea, neways, after playin, i went home to bathe den i went back out again wif my kakak, no i dun haf a sis, she's my couz. heh! went to Bugis Street. n hell did i spent alot of money, but it was worth it. bought 3 tank tops & 2 bags. guez how muc i spent in all? onli 26bucks to b exact! it's stil alot of money spent as i dun haf a job rite now. grrrr!! but the tings i bought r worth a steal man! weeeeeeeee~! i've got new stuffs to wear n use now. heh! wait til i get a job, n shoppin wil b lyk woah!
she writes at 02:40 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Drained~
my dad juz came back home todae from his 1-day-i-duno-wut-for-KL-trip. neways, he bought a dozen Dunkin Donuts!! ate lyk a pig. i particularly lurveeeee the one wic is completely coated wif icing sugar n filled wif oozing strawberries jam. yummmy yum yum!!
im feeling drained now. went swimming wif my 2 lil bro n mom juz now. danish, my lil bro luked so cute in his swimming trunk, wic r actually underwear! ahahahahaha!! cute giler!! was suppose to mit dear ira, but she cudn't make cuz of sum jemputan. had gr8 fun at the swimming complex tho i din get to mit her.
i did noe tt the piXx in my blog cant be seen. well,i guez thanXx to Sid, i now noe. so, ken the piXx b seen now? thanXx alot grrl!!
eurgh! fought wif my mama again cuz of the same-boring-shitty-subj. tings ken neva go right wen tt subj is brought up. darn it! hate it! curse it! burn it! kick it!bury it! argh!! i juz haf to live wif it...
she writes at 02:33 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Lucky ME!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!! ahahahahaha!! i noe im realli late to say tt. hu cares. my NY resolution? i tink it'll juz be simple. to tink positively. neways, did spring cleanin in my bloody room todae. went thru sum stuffs n got a lil surprise. found an envelope containin 20bucks!!, the leftover amt from the recent Hari Raya. weeeeee!! boi am i happi. juz happi cuz i've found sum cash. wif tt amt, i tink it's tym i get the shoe tt i've been eyein. here's a glimpse of wut it luks lyk
so, wut do u tink of it? i tink it's nice n worth it. fiz said it was nice. well, for oDi, darn u! hehez... he said it luks lyk a ballet shoe. ahahahahaha!! maeb it does. pple's opinion do play a part, but for dis matter, i guez the guys opinion are an avoidance. ahahahahaha!! sorie oDi!
i wanna go on a holiday!! sumone bring me sumwhere. i wanna get my first plane ride experience soon!! hehez!! well, u guezed it. i've neva taken a plane b4. take me aniwhere. juz aniwhere wil do, juz so tt i ken shop til i drop. drop dead perhaps. feel lyk goin JB to shop, but, i dun haf much cash, so no point makin a trip dere. i'll haf to get a job first den i'll start shoppin lyk a kerazee grrrl.
she writes at 06:24 p.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Serendipity
see the poster up dere? gosh, fell in lurve wif the show after watchin it. i noe it's kinda old, bout 2 yrs ago i guess, but i haven watched it til today. great show. it's on my fave movie list rite now.
Serendipity. it means the faculty of making fortunate discoveries by accident. the show focused alot on fate n destiny, wic i kind of believe in. stil, it's juz a show n the real world doesn't work lyk in the movies.
all i've gotta say is, believing in urself is muc more important than believing in the hallucination of wic life may offer.
she writes at 03:00 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Am I Really That Emo?!?!
well, blog hopped n landed on dis quiz. tried it out to see wat's my true music image. n here's the result:
You are an Official Emo-Kid! Congratulations! Would
you like a tissue? Sniff..Sniff?
>>Your True Music Image<<(punkrocker? thug? diva-licious,emo-kid,Metal head,indie rocker?)
brought to you by Quizilla
gosh! emo kid i am. cud be true, other than me juz being an emo music image. things haf not always gone my way the past few yrs. not aniwhere near my liking at all. lately, i've been havin dis sickness or rather, eatin disorder, i tink. i cud last the whole day by juz munchin on sum biscuits. the sight n smell of food makes me wanna puke!! as a result, i lost weight. maeb a hell lot of weight. cudn't try n find out wat my weight was as my houz has no weighing scale. but juz by lookin at my wrist n practically my whole body, i noticed tt i've shrunk, thinner tt is. i realli wonder is it bcuz of dis n that, that resulted in me losing my appetite. frens tink im crazy, but i tink im not. haf to admit it, but i sumtimes do. i tink im juz emotionally upset bout tings n shud not tink n worry too muc. maeb i shud tell sumone bout my prob, but i dun lyk the idea of making tt sumone feel lyk im a burden to them. n so, i dun tell. simple as tt. socializing more n goin out to ease tt sick mind of mine shud b a great idea. but i cant. i haf my reason for tt. well, i shud try to stop n worry, but i cant. i neva will. n i wont. n for pete's sake, i dun tink i nid ani help. im totally fine.
she writes at 02:10 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Pessimistic?
i've always thot tt tings wud not turn out the way i wan it to be. but yesterdae's outin wif Ira, Danial & Fai, got me tinkin n changed the better of me. i tink so. it was realli great juz hagin out wif them. the usuals, Danial; mr-talk-nonsense got me cracking at tyms, Fai; the clown hu laffs one sec n back to his serious face the next (wonder how u do tt ah?), n of coz Ira; the blonde babe hu's so cute n bubbly. those 3 frens of mine realli cheered me up inside my exhausted, kill me soul. the four of us were suppose to watch "The Lord Of The Ring: Return Of The Kings" at Lido, but the tix were all sold out. we din go n check out at Cineleisure as Fai saw his group of frens n dey too, wanted to watch LOTR but all tix were sold out at every plc dey tried. all we wanted was to get a nice, comfy seat wif popcorns to munch on (except for me! i dun lyk popcorns!) in the freezing cinema while watchin the ever-thrilling LOTR. sad but true, we din get to watch it. felt the pinch of unhappiness but savin tt $8.50 for the tix got the betta of me!
we den left for Far East Plaza to haf our lunch, or was it dinner? ahaha... wateva it is we ate at the top level. not at Puncak or Cahaya but the unknown shop to me, juz beside Cahaya. upon reachin, i saw Mai, Nas & gang. said Hi! to Mai n shook hands wif her. she looked pretty, as always!! headed to an empty table n ordered our food. thot i was hungry, but half a plate of Honeydew rice left me struggling to finish the other half. Danial, my tong sampah, finished my food up. danial juz got his pay, so he kindly footed the bill. thanXx dan!!
after eating, we headed to Lucky Plaza to play Pool. yikes!! my 1st tym being in the Pool plc n 1st tym too, strugglin to learn n play. saw inn n fad dere. the 1st game between danial n ira was a breeze. ira n danial were masters of the game, so dey taught me a lil here n dere. fai taught me a lil theory bout pool, tho he claims he din noe how to play. well, he did, but was juz a beginner. stupid me dun even noe tt the stick was actually called a cue! din wanna try my hands on the game at all til the veri last min. n wif danials teachin, i managed to put bout 5 of those balls (is dere a name for those balls?) into the hole. yey!! accomplishment made.
danial wanted to get sum clothes so we went shoppin. he decided to buy a few n treated us again, but on clothes. each of us got a shirt. thanXx again!!
happily, we all took the train back to tamp where once again, we stopped by n ate at KFC for supper. bought myself a Zinger meal, but one bite of the burger left me full!! how strange can i be? as usual, danial my saviour, my tong sampah helped me finished it up to avoid me wastin food. ate while we slack dere tellin stories of our stupid, kiddy days n laffin at those memories. dey called me hyper; hyper at nyte, as i was bullshitting n laffin till my lungs cramped, but where was my hand placed at, relieving the pain? at my kidney. weird eyy?!?! nearly 11.30pm, we all decided to head hm.
i shudn't be too pessimistic after all. the day was well spent n it turned out great. more lyk superb!! let's do it again?!?! bowling maeb? juz lyk Fai recommended!!
she writes at 04:36 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
Credits!!
ThanXx a whole lot to APIS!! if it weren't for him, dere'll stil be no entries for all to see. ThanXx again!!
she writes at 12:26 a.m.
♥ |izA`elleXcrie ♥ ®
| "A short saying often contains much wisdom." |
|